Crazies

Time Travelin'

2006-05-12T21:45:00.000-07:00

Introduction:

You Are Not A Fuckwit

As with everything in the world, there were three degrees of time machine. But people, such as myself, are prone to exaggeration and the tendency to find patterns can be overwhelming.

However that may be, there are always three levels, or degrees, to everything. If you don't believe me, you are a fuckwit and if you are offended at my saying so, then you are also wasting your gaddamn time and, frankly, beginning to irritate me. Fuckwit.

As I was saying, like art, bureaucracy, number theory and naturalism, there are three degrees of time machine. These are, I think, obviously, micro-, macro- and nominal/local: that is, very small, very big and “normal.” Normal, for some reason, difficult to define, is akin to what you can sense without special machines or symbols. Example: With numbers, on either side of zero, you (or a machine) can count indefinitely. Bigger and bigger. Continuing to Infinity (which isn't a number, but a concept, like “shit, big!” Or negative infinity, which is also impossibly big, only negative. Then again with numbers, there is the “shit, small” — closer and closer to zero. With nature, we may treat “shit, big” with a telescope, “shit, small” with a microscope, and nominal/local with, duh, our own naked eyes. To review: Fuckin' small, like amoeba or H₂O molecules or even subatomic particles; Ridiculously big, as interplanetary/inter solar/intergalactic distances; and, local/nominal… ya know, your neighbor's car or maybe your cat or any blade of grass.

Got it? Good. You aren't a fuckwit. But don't congratulate yourself, it isn't something to be too proud of. Like literacy, I take it for granted that you aren't a fuckwit, just like I've been taking it for granted that you can read. You should be way beyond being surprised that written words make sense. Be proud of something else. For instance: do you know any funny jokes?

Where was I?

Chapter I:

I Ate Your Goldfish. It Tasted Good.

Go Back In Time and Stop Me.

Now you, being not a fuckwit, and clearly literate, are still with me. Assuming a) this is not a library; b) you are not a thief, speed-reader or buying second-hand; c) not me, writing these very words (or serving in some editorial/proof-reading capacity) – or even d) one of the dozen-or-so folks I've given free copies to, e) some other reason, yeah: assuming I don't know you and you aren't a bastard, maybe your continued interest may get me paid (unless this IS a library…) (…or my blog…)

Time travel. As with everything in the world, there were three degrees of time machine. Of course that really just means that there is a possibility of a vast continuum of time machine and you'd simply design and build for what-ever suited you.

Want to see the formation of destruction of the Earth, the solar system, the Cosmos? Yeah: Macro-time. Macro-time machine, take 10 (million years) and start adding zeros by multiplying by, eh, ten.

Maybe you just want to go back a couple days or years to watch a certain favorite movie in a theater, or beat up a child-hood bully. That'd be nominal, local time travel. Unfortunately local time-travel is for anthropologists and selfish fuckwits. Just like Range Rovers.

Now, it comes to my attention that micro time travel, greatly leaned upon in the teleportation industry, is the ONLY KIND OF TIME TRAVEL ALLOWED BY EINSTEIN and F. Gauss. Don't like it? Go back in time and debate the thing. I should warn you, though, Gauss may not even talk to you if you don't know your higher math (or French). Einstein, if ya catch him later on, speaks a little English—unfortunately, compared to him, you're probably a half-wit or a monkey. But Einstein may be too polite to say so. (Gauss, however, may be so bold as to invent the term 'fuckwit' just for you.)

The great problem for nominal and macro-time travel is information. You can't know before you know: It is a paradox. But this ONLY APPLIES TO GOING BACK IN TIME. Of course we're all going forward in time, simultaneously… nominally. And we REMEMBER the past, imperfectly, perhaps, but still…

If I send you back in time and you change anything, talk to anyone, you will destroy even the concept of time travel: Fuckwit.

This is why I'm not sending you. You, me and the – now MACRO – whole human population can't be trusted. Maybe Descartes, but he's dead and I can't trust you to go to Sweden and bring him back. Instead, we'll use voodoo. … and astrology. Why not?

I am not a fuckwit. Voodoo, yes, but that crack about astrology, that was a test. By the way: do you remember your goldfish? I bet you don't even know what I'm talking about. That's O.K. It serves to illustrate a point about time travel: If the time-traveler changes anything, mother nature takes it upon herself to step up and fix things. This is the (new) central thesis of this document (the old thesis: 'You are not a fuckwit,' has been trashed and, I believe, obviously, debunked).

The Unbearable Paternalism of
Mother Nature. (That old Bitch.)

Call me a fuckwit, but I am constantly amazed at how ingeniously mother nature shields sentient beings (and half-wits) from the realization that clumsy anthropologists keep accidentally changing the time-line. For example: I'm more than a little peeved at the loss of my talking dog named Spot, my sex-crazed girlfriend who loved to give me blow-jobs and my PhD from M.I.T.. I miss the girlfriend the most. It's kind-of OK about Spot, though – his indifferent kleptomania was an albatross, a constant source of humiliation and embarrassment. Pluswhich, fucker never spoke a gaddamn word to anyone but me. Tell ya the truth, I'm glad to be rid of him. Anyway, the talking cat's better: at least he's afraid of water. (And I don't have to plagiarize Warner Bros to talk about him…)
It occurs to me that mother nature doesn't need to protect half-wits from knowledge of time-line changes: she just does that as a public service. Certainly it'd look bad to give inbred half-wits evidence of UFOs, miracles and a living Elvis … come to think of it, maybe mother nature has been slacking off lately… Mother nature is like the TA whose under appreciated job it is to check that I haven't plagiarized.
I think mother nature has a drinking problem. And don't get me started in on her and the freakin' gambling. “Uncertainty principle,” indeed. Maybe the whole thing's going to shit. The more I know, the less I like, like US foreign policy, pain and sexually transmitted diseases. Oh, and the great proliferation of fuckwits. I sometimes say: “How'd that fuckwit get that job?” or “Haven't they fired that fuckwit yet?” and, of course, the obligatory, “Who voted for that fuckwit?” …
There is definite evidence that mother nature has finally said “fuck it” and went off to take a nap. Someone went back in time and voted (repeatedly) for certain rich bastards and now we're all in debt. Then again, maybe mother nature doesn't have to be sober to do her thing: people don't seem to see ALL THIS as evidence that we're being fucked with by time-traveling intelligencies from beyond the galaxy. Or time-traveling greedy fuckwits from Texas. (I suppose it is just a matter of perspective.) (For the record, I've actually, personally met kind-of nice and intelligent people from Texas: Why didn't they get time-machine privileges is beyond my fucking comprehension. Hamsters would have done less damage…)
But I've gone way off subject and began editorializing (it's what I do when I go off-subject; sorry). Where was I anyway?

Chapter II:

You're Still Reading This?

As with everything in the world, there were three degrees of time machine. Zerg was using a type II device (in the nominal range, days, weeks) to send and receive information into (eh, from) the past.

Zerg needed accuracy to three decimal places and often cocked-up his research and had to start all over. Finally, nerves frayed, he decided to “borrow” someone else's results and this is where our story begins. (Bet you lost faith that there even was a story. Bet you failed to notice the repeated past-tense of time machine … I try to resist using 'fuckwit,' but geez…)
Here's Zerg's thinking: Go into the future, take any random anthropology dissertation, bring it back, submit it and (snap fingers sound) voila! Instant PhD or Master's degree … whatever. Zerg, it turns out, wasn't actually used to doing his own work. I guess being born to power and money can do that to a person. On the other hand, why do I care if Zerg's degree is legitimate? Maybe I'm still pissed off about the whole “Santa Claus” thing. I just can't believe people can so brazenly lie, I guess. Anyway, he hacks away at what it means to have a degree and … and that he could do it, that he did it and it is OBVIOUS that he didn't get past, say … forth grade on his own merits kind of ruins it for everyone! (But I'm also a bit peeved that I was so naïve well into my second dozen years of life, almost into my third: Now who's the fuckwit?)
Zerg's name is a four-letter word. That's as obvious as I'm going to make things. (Also, I may have changed “history” to “anthropology” — but we WERE talking about time-travel.)
When I was kinda young a VERY attractive bohemian woman (you don't know her) told me why she doesn't vote. She may have had some of the details wrong, but basically, she has a point. (I may have to go back in time with my type III device to tell her – she'd be younger than I am now. This situation begs the question: How's your memory? Was she really hot and super smart, like my pre-teen self insists? We'll find out. What was her name again? Started with … 'D' … ?)
Politics! Yes! Now here is an excellent example of micro, macro and local/nominal. Think about it. It certainly seems to be a matter of perspective… OK, so maybe there's no real “micro” politics (individual pennies in tax revenue?) and “macro” may be an exaggeration (“It only starts to matter when you're talking about BILLIONS of dollars…” maybe not) – but, compared to nominal/local, they're both fucking out of reach. Without voodoo (and large sums of cold hard special interest cash).
Sing along if you like: As with everything in the world, there were three degrees of time machine. (Be sure to emphasize “were.”) My finger hurts. Can you believe I'm writing this in pencil? See if Zerg finds a way to plagiarize this. Ha ha. Fuckin' Zerg. By the way, do you know any funny jokes? I could use a laugh about now. And a beer, I mean, if you're indulging me … no? Oh, OK. Just, it was a hot day yesterday and …

Let's talk about accuracy. Hmm. Right. That very SENTENCE lacks accuracy. Maybe “we” should talk about “honesty” first? OK, I'll write about accuracy, you just try not to move your lips while you READ about accuracy, that is, my mini-essay about accuracy.
Zerg needed accuracy to three decimal places. Did I say “needed”? “Need” may be too strong a word. Oh well. Sometimes a rough estimation just isn't enough. Before I used a blade of grass as an example of nominal. However, a yard full of grass or “all the grass growing along the Mississippi river” or “All the grass ever” brings to questions of scale. And discussions of scale bring us to estimations of accuracy. (We could go the other way and justify 'blade of grass' as nominal: how many atoms of carbon are there in a cubic ¼ millimeter of this particular blade of grass?
I want some serious accuracy with those numbers. For people like Zerg, accuracy doesn't matter much, because he has stumbled upon the thesis of this document (I changed it again, sorry, I forgot to tell you…) — it is that “most people don't know anyway” and “those that do know can't contradict you if you are in power” and “most people don't care anyway.” Finally, “if you are in a position of power, they'll likely just take your word for it anyway…” A person of Zerg's background can do a lot with those data.
Accuracy be damned! The answer to the question “how many” depends on either a) how much you personally care or b) how willing other people are to re-produce your observations and/or contradict your findings. c) anyone's willingness to contradict you and their ability to do so loud enough for it to make a difference. Good luck fuckin' honest people. Good luck curious people and, finally, good luck hard workin' starvin' poverty-stricken can't-afford-medical-insurance people. Seriously: Good luck.
A dependable type II or III time machine is like having a lot of money. You can use the thing for all kinds of mischief. For instance, you can make your illiterate smug self the president. Time machines (and gobs of cash) are useful that way. And, as Zerg is about to find out, they are also both equally useful for avoiding having to actually do something. Pluswhich, loads of cash (and time machines) can help if you're a compulsive liar: Money and time travel can make people believe your self-serving lies: no matter how blatant. No matter how compulsive you are about telling lies or even how OBVIOUS you are about the very act of lying to people. Even if everything you say is a lie…
You want to save the world, here's what you do (pay attention, I learned this from Ann Coulter): 1) create a completely fictitious world with simplistic and dishonest problems. 2) write a book about the world created in 1. 3) Be careful to blame who-ever is your opposition back in the tired real world (that is, most likely, the ones who will be most peeved at your lying, just a guess). 4) Deny that the world you created out of your own smelly ass (in 1) is a device, a fictional world of simplistic and dishonest problems. 5) Complain that the science in the real world (not your fake one) can't adequately answer policy questions (in your fake world), cannot “realistically predict” anything or “is being used by those with an 'agenda'.” Finally 6) Without denying that you, yourself, have an agenda, and being careful not to use the word “agenda,” pretend you are above that sort of thing.

If all else fails: resort to name-calling. Recall how well it works for me: fuckwit. (Figure out for yourself who I learned that last one from…)
Chapter IV:

What the Fuck Happened To Chapter III?
See? That's the thing about accuracy, without it, you subject your audience to weird shit. Plus: you risk having to lie to defend yourself when all you were originally guilty of was laziness. I shouldn't have to work too hard (heh) to convince you not only that laziness isn't a crime, but that probably all mammals hold it up as an ideal. Fuckin' cats and hamsters sure do. And computer programmers, too: else, why bother programming? Think about it. (That's right, I'm trying to live up the the male lion's example.)
You probably expect me to say (eh, “write”): “Only a fuckwit would wonder what happened to chapter 3.” I hate to disappoint amateur psychics: Only a fuckwit would wonder what happened to chapter 3. (FYI: Professional psychics don't waste their time on me.)
Why I don't run for president.
The reason I don't run for president is NOT because I'm only 31. It is also NOT because I don't have a powerful father or uncle and a truckload of cash and oil rights. Nope, the reason, the true reason I don't run for president is that my type I time machine isn't adequate for the cause. That's the truth, really. :)

-r

PS:

Personal stuff: “dirty five-thirty” gets a bit blistery in the summer (hot here). “Dirty five-thirty” is an expression I picked up recently. Never mind.

-=-

GAS PRICE WAR!!!!

2006-04-28T21:45:00.000-07:00

You may be surprised to hear this, but I'm not going to complain about the price of gas.
-r
PS:
However, as it comes to my attention by various channels, gas prices have gone up and up and up. Meanwhile, gas compainies have made more money than any other company ever, that's in the history of companies, money and whatever else…

So! My buddy back in Huntington Beach sent me an email. Normally this is a very Earth/Eco-friendly guy. This guy complained about how "animal control" mistreated a cougar caught in a tree in a "residential" area (human residential area, not cougar residential area) out on the edge of town (whatever town; a 'burb of some big megalopolous)… whatever, it doesn't matter.

click here to read the letter

If you don't want to read that email, let me tell you briefly what is going on: some consumer activist-type is complaining about gas prices and suggesting that we boycott the two largest (which are the same company) gas companies and force them to lower their price and that'll, he-or-she postulates will make the other companies lower their prices to compete (that can't happen anyway, because as soon as the first company lowered their price, the boycott would be broken, no matter what magic you held over the participants heads, but that is beside the point. I was and am really pissed off about this email. It isn't like we're talking about air here, we're talking about a fossil fuel which will be depleted eventually, destroys the planet to mine and use, causes weird "foreign policy" decisions and keeps certain cretens in power. I know Americans are greedy and money and power hungry, but this is just too much. I say to these fuckers: Didn't your mom ever tell you to clean up your room? Yeah? Apply that logic to the WHOLE MOTHER-LOVIN' PLANET.

Meanwhile, this is what I replied to my pseudo-eco-buddy… — oh, by the way, brace yourself for a rant…

I like you, <eco-buddy>, but that's a really stupid email/forwarded message.

…

It doesn't matter what the price, there are less than 300 million americans and not all of us have cars. Some of us have mulitple cars, so maybe that "averages out" but it isn't important to my issue.

My issue is that even if there were ONLY ONE CAR EVER, if it runs on GAS, it will eventually, one day, have none left. It takes WAY TOO LONG to make the oil and natural gas and coal that we humans are just throwing away. Meanwhile, wind and solar power (... hell, soy deisel, too) ... moving rivers (we don't like to do this anymore, though...) ... anyway, there are "renewable" sources of energy. It doesn't matter whose pocketbook we attack. The gas companies and auto companies are just taking our money and robbing the earth -- us, our future, whatever -- of these resources ... they block legislation to regulate them, their profits, emissions ... in LA they turned the whole place into "car culture" and you are treated like an idiot or something if you don't drive, refuse to drive or can't afford to drive. Reminds me of drug dealers in those fairy tales adults tell kids: first they get you hooked, then they look the other way as you rob people to help you pay for your habit. FUCK ALL. Take public transportation, use a bicycle. Walk, whatever. Find a way to convert your vehicle to something renewable. The rest of the world is moving toward sustainability; if AMERICA doesn't catch up, we'll -- after we finish fucking up the atomosphere -- have to have a crash course later (when there /is/ no oil).

Complaining about "high gas prices" is bullshit. In England gas is ALWAYS $10/gallon (usa equilivant) ... they don't drive unless it is necessary. Hell, in New York City, few people drive. It reminds me of little kids whining. "I want ice cream I want ice cream" ... a) it isn't fuckin' good for you, b) you ate it all already and I had to pay for it, c) you wasted half of what you had in the first place.

All three apply to people and gasoline.

-r

PS:

As someone who sometimes goes on tirades about nature, I wouldn't have expected such an email from you.

-=-

Finally: check out this article, and this article.
…and lastly, I just don't like chain emails…
-=-

Absentee

2006-03-30T10:37:00.000-08:00

No one comments anymore? My fault, I guess, for being gone so long. Maybe people want to say: "Don't feel sorry for yourself, you loser piece of shit," but can't find the 'polite' way of saying it. Or, perhaps, my three readers have gone on vacation or decided to boycott me. But maybe I don't reason well and there are other factors. However, being that I've been gone for-like-ever, I'm going to go with the theory that the two or three people who used to read this blog have found something more productive to do (maybe read a blog that it updated more often)?

Productive

What does it mean to be productive, anyway? My single gripe, I think, with the world can easily be boiled down; besides, I think it may be a local problem. Plus, I have a new insight, which is actually an old insight and I've seen it before, too, so it isn't even new to me, however I forgot it, and so it is new now: Some people can't figure out how to fix themselves, so they decide the society/culture is broken and try to fix it. This, from page 198 of a paper-back version of Isaac Asimov's "The Caves of Steel." I'm paraphrasing, but that's the gist. Just so you know that I'm a little tiny bit self-aware.

Headings

I like headings. I like typing "in sito" html. Like the non-breaking space code, etc. This is because I'm a computer-language snob. It's like if you go to France and you have that one asshole American who tries to show off to his friends by talking to the waitress in French. They hate it, you think he's an asshole, she's a waitress, so probably has to pretend to think it's nice and correct or whatever (bigger tip, perhaps). Yeah, so just like that. Does it make it easier to read? No. Can most people tell? No. What good is it? Well, I know that I did it, so that's its value.

H3

That heading is <h3 align="center">H3</h3>. I'm so proud.
Cats
(That is not a heading, I just wrote "Cats" with line break codes around it.) Both cats are here in the bedroom—Oh, I'm using the IBM Thinkpad (from Japan) to type this. The linux machine has some kind of blogger blockout or something; blogger doesn't typically work from the "machine on the right." Cats: I've probably talked about our cats before. There are two and they came as a set. The people at the Humane Society Animal Shelter convinced us (we aren't difficult to convince, so it wasn't a trick or anything) that these two kittens (they were kittens at the time) were brother and sister from the same litter. This is looking less-and-less true as they get older and was probably a lie, on its face, when we first heard it; but like I said, we're easy to convince. But here's my "evidence" that they're probably not brother and sister, let alone the same litter (fraternal twins, fraternal half-twins [supposedly more than one male cat can fertilize more than one egg in a female cat when she's in heat, so sometimes you have fraternal half-twins, that is, assuming more than one non-sterile male when your she-cat goes into heat; you should get your she-cat fixed, because going into heat is a sad little sight]): 1) Rainy (female) has a flattish face, not so flat as a Burmese, but flattish compared to her "brother," Sunny. Sunny's face is longer, like a mountain lion, not like a Siamese, but still clearly longer than Rainy's. 2) She can curl her tail, he doesn't seem able to curl his tale (nor willing to let me curl it for him). 3) She is "tabby-and-white," but so is he, and both have white bellies and chins, white feet (not necessarily white legs, though). However! Sunny is symetrical; Rainy is, decidedly, not. Plus he is GREY! Sunny's fur is like a medium grey with smallish lighter-grey "thumbprint" tabby stripes. Rainy's tabby-stripes are obvious, pluswhich she has a black (!) stripe down her back, effectively splitting her tabbyness in two. She also, though it is less obvious now, has a white scar-looking stripe going through her left eye (used to be really clear and was kind of cool looking; now it is less obvious, yet still cool, imho). They are different genders and this may have an effect on their behavior, so I can't compare that, pluswhich, how we treat them will also effect their behavior; so if we treat her different or something, and we probably wouldn't even be aware of it, she'll be different. But, in case it matters, and it isn't behavioral, Rainy has turned herself into a little pudge-ball of a cat, whereas Sunny is weirdly skinny; he even has that "extra tummy" skin/fur under him when he walks that tempts me to grab it and say: "what is this, huh, Sunny?" Which I do, infrequently. Rainy's tummy is, of course, firm. Behavior-wise, and I'm only saying this because it's cute, not because it helps my argument, but: If you rub or pet Rainy's tunny, she'll roll onto her back and purr like she was a machine specifically made to emit purring noises. Sunny, however, not so. If you rub or pat Sunny's tummy, he'll engage you in a game we call "grab and bite," in which he, as you may have guessed, grabs onto whatever part of you he can and then bites it, sometimes really hard. Then again, I encourage this behavior. I think it's cute.

Pictures

I wish I had some digital pictures of the cats and perhaps I will soon. I'd love to bask vicariously in their glory by posting their adorable likenesses onto this blog. Maybe then people would actually comment.
-r

PS:
Even today I have a large Chico State cup full of coffee. Still learning Calculus. Re-reading several Asimov novels, I did the Galactic Empire series, now I've started the Robot novels (the Butte County Library is so kind to me). I re-newed Kurt Vonegut's Breakfast of Champions (audio CD), on the off-chance that they get me the actual book version-if I read it while the Stanley Tucci reads it on the CD, I'll memorize it forever. That's all for now; thanks for reading, assuming you did; otherwise screw off.

-=-

Clone wars

2006-03-29T12:19:00.000-08:00

Because friend (and barber) Martin was going to host the mic-less open mic (he just called it 'spoken word'), I was inspired to write a poem (I don't have it with me and I don't remember it, but the pseudo-title was 'I killed my clone').

CSU

I'm right now on the forth floor of the CSU, Chico library.
Probably I'm not allowed to be here; maybe I'm allowed as a Ca resident, but probably I'm not allowed to be using the computer. M went to class and is using me as a seat holder/warmer—I've been used for less (doorstop, etc). The problem I have, and I should repeat that I really don't have, I guess, the right to complain, not being an actual student, anyway the problem I have is that for some gaddamned reason the fuckin' people using the computers and study table (to the left of the elevators as you get off them) are always fucking loud. Doesn't anyone know what it means to be in a library anymore? It isn't like there aren't places that have computers and are more social, I've been to the BMU (student union building holds a post-mod college cafeteria, run by a mafia-like "associated students" which is probably, and, I think, most likely, a misleading suggestion of student involvement and employment/ownership—God I'm cynical about this place—and the bookstore, also AS) and it ain't quiet; and there aren't signs telling me to be quiet, so I make the necessary assumptions. But LIBRARY?!??
*sighs*
M is less cautious than I. She notes: "Those loud Asians."
This is typical, being that she is Japanese, in both the ethnic and national sense; she is an international student…

Chicago

Speaking of M. We had one of our typical fights about what a piece-of-shit loser I am and how she is embarrassed because her "friends think [she] is stupid for helping" me. That is, letting me stay with her and "not pay rent." (For the record, I did not intend to talk about this, and probably shouldn't; too much pain, no objectivity, etc.) But I have conflicting information, a) I help her with her studying, and am always available for whatever small (or otherwise) chore she sets for me, sometimes this involves helping one of her friends (but rarely). b) I only came to Chico in the first place because she brought me. If I get a job in this weird cheap-student-labor burg, I'll end up being a laborer of some stripe: ie. underpaid, not appreciated and easily replaced by a high school student who won't bother to stand up for herself. Alternatives are to find a job in Sacramento or the Bay Area, but she seems content to veto them. So: Rob's options seem to be "degrade yourself and get paid very little for the same," "magically produce a pile of money," and, I suppose, "leave." Unfortunately, two things: In spite of this single issue, this one argument, I really like this girl. I don't like how she makes me feel small, unwanted and useless when she seems unaware that it isn't all that difficult to be the kid of some foreign rich folks, but it is a fascististic government we run here and I am disallowed to defend myself, especially with such venom. It causes weird side-effects. I am troubled; the other day, in the middle of our issue, but I was inside before she was, from a trip to Costco, anyway, I'm not sure exactly what happened, maybe I desire some kind of physical injury to parallel my emotional/psychological injuries, but today I have a serious bruise on my right-hand-pinky-knuckle and a weird bruise/cut (like a boxer!?!!) over my right eye. The fucked-up-person's equivilant of, I guess, punching a wall (or another person): Punch yourself. Some people opt to take it out on people even worse off than themselves, in my case, two cats. Unfortunately, the scales are a bit too tipped in my direction and, barring some insight on their part, the cats can't fight back AT ALL. Not that I'm willing to drop the analogy; I'm just not going to abuse the cats just because I can: it's just wrong. *sighs* You may think the above was cathartic, but now I'm going to have to worry that I thought the things too much and they left permanent lines on my face and that it'll start its own episode of said fight. Meanwhile, I used the Rush website (it's a temp company, not a loudmouthed idiot) to upload my job qualifications. I'm trying to look forward to the abuse they'll inflict. But I didn't talk about Chicago.

Chicago

It is premature for me to write anything about next year, even this December, however I can report the past. Some people can change gears rapidly, some people can't. After certain painful arguments (ie. 'you are worthless, fuck off and die'), I tend to simmer for a number of days and try not to be angry, try not even to be distant. You won't believe this, but I'm probably, on the surface anyway, chipper, and less cynical when I'm actually feeling the most of a wreck; which is how I feel, what is wrong with this planet when someone who is capable of helping, who is capable of solving problems is reduced to the level of begging for work at McDonald's? Where was I? Oh yeah, Chicago. M graduates in December. The other day, this is AFTER the fight described above, she actually expressed a desire to live in Chicago. Some people may know that I hold a reverence for Chicago that borders on the mythical. This is normal, and correct me if I'm wrong, for people who lived in provincial (read: Small towns south of Chicago in) Illinois. We also tend to hold St. Louis in high esteem, but maybe we don't because I'm dealing here with a sample of one, myself. So I'm reasoning with the same data as Freud. Shitty company. But, considering how people talked about bigger towns when I was younger and living in Ill, I think my guess is pretty sound. Plus theres the architecture and the Lake. Plus the culture is in the East. But I've been contradicted on that point by a man named Dennis who is a graduate student/lecturer for the CSU whom we found on a walk (the day before the argument); he uses wax in his abstract paintings; they are quite good and I wish I was a rich foreigner so I could buy one or two; he says that besides New York, Los Angeles (of all places) is an art center; what with the Getty, LACMA and MOCA. But I've lived in L.A., so I disagree. People there don't care about art, they are superficial. Being in SoCal (minus, perhaps, San Diego) perhaps has that effect on a person/maybe it is just the big city thing; who fucking knows or cares. If you're from L.A. and feel it necessary to defend yourself as being non-superficial, don't bother: When I was there, I was perhaps not superficial, but individuals don't act as groups, groups are groups and as a group the Los Angelenos are fucking superficial as hell. Shall we move on?

Fighting

This particular fight happened on Monday and we did go to spoken word (mic-less open mic sans Kyle, the usual host; ZS knows this guy better than anyone, unfortunately for him and perhaps for K as well, he may resent my talking about it, I'm sure K would, too bad for K). Fighting: the thing about this fight is, it may have been avoided (or, at least, delayed) except that I was already ill-well. The parking situation was what it was on Monday and I had to drive the car back home. I was in a hurry to get M after her class but suddenly had to use the bathroom, like, right now! More of this "too much coffee" thing I talk about, but for some reason, still drink too much coffee; it's tasty, and I'm addicted. Besides, I can't have cigarettes, M, also an ex-smoker (she smoked much much more and longer than I did, in fact) doesn't like them, and not necessarily for their economic impact on poor families, etc.—she could smell the cigarette(s) on my breath and didn't want to kiss, so I quit smoking. Of course, now we don't kiss all that much anyway so what was gained, I ask you. Sure, my health, but who the fuck cares about that, I'm a negative piece of shit who doesn't "work" etc. Moving on?
So I was late going to pick M up after her class and she was in conversation with a waitress we know from her favorite restaurant (which serves Chinese food) the waitress is also a psyc major at the CSU. Apparently M asked her about finding a job in Chico; now, a computer consultant/programmer/database expert is not exactly going to go about finding a job the same way as a college student/psyc major/waitress, but that's a whole other issue. My inability to explain myself and her bizarre insistance that people think she's stupid (including, supposedly, myself, because I'm "using" her and "must therefore think [she's] stupid" and a few other "mis" understandings she harbors.

I should quit now, she will be here now and I don't want to preach about facism.
-r

…however, I wasn't exactly feeling well when the fight began, that's what I was going to say.

-=-

Calculus(t)

2006-03-21T11:12:00.000-08:00

Ahhhhhhhh…
Ohkay, I feel better.

How are ya?
Don't answer that.

Yesterday's project had nothing to do with Pokémon (honest!): I was going to use the CSUC library to find a half-way decent Calculus book. That's right, only one. I picked 3 that looked promising from the stacks, and discarded 2 (a two-volume set) from the "folio" section, because I didn't and don't know if M can check those suckers out (I don't even know what 'folio' means in this context). Excuse me, I have to go change the CD--I'm recording to a minidisc all my Belly/Tanya Donelly stuff… I'm back. Where was I? Oh yeah: getta calculus book. The plan was to flip through the 3 books and pick the best one. However! The first one I opened, "What Is Calculus About?" by W.W.Sawyer (New Mathematical Library, 1961, Yale) was kind of easy to read and was like an introduction to a precalculus class or something. So I had M check out all three, as I didn't even peek at the other two, "Introductory Calculus >>> With Analytic Geometry" by Edward G. Begle (also Yale, 1954), and "From Calculus to Chaos An Introduction to Dynamics" by David Acheson (ISBN: 0198502575). I've since finished the "What about…" book. I recommend it, honestly. I really recommend the Teach Yourself Calculus book, but CSUC's library didn't have it. gotta go change CDs again, excuse me. Later, I'll probably try the ol' profiteering route (not that it matters, ya'all never click&buy my suggestions anyway) and make amazon.com links.

Minidisc

For some reason, every so often, I get a bug up my ass, that's right, a bug up my ass, and start listening to and enjoying my minidisc player and small collection of minidiscs. My sweetheart, M (why do they so frequently have the first initial, 'M,' anyway… hm.) one day spontaneously asked me, "Do you want me to buy you more minidiscs?" I thought she was kidding, and, at any rate, this is not something to be taken lightly. Minidiscs are rare, especially here (our apartment), and it isn't like my having 10 brand new blank minidiscs would do her any good whatsoever, so I, somewhat homefully, said: "that'd be cool." Or did I say: "Fuck yes!" (?) But I didn't push the subject, however, I was a bit of a dick in looking for the best price and stuff (wouldn't want her to forget and dash my hopes now). So what I'm doing right now is I'm "remixing" my Belly/Tanya Donelly (she's Belly's lead singer, in case you don't know, yet somehow manage to care anyway) because it was previously on a TDK 74min MD and I remember I had to cut a few songs (they were duplicates, to be sure, but the finished disc didn't represent the collection I have). Meanwhile, the ZOMBIESLAYER (see link at sidebar) loaned me a good 15 CDs including 5, that's right FIVE, Pink Floyd albums. Surprisingly, Pink Floyd all fits on one Minidisc (Black ONE, I call it; the new ones all have colors). excuse me again I like minidisc because I can put a buttload (buttload = approx. 5 hours, 20 minutes) of music on each MD (those are the 80min ones) and then organize them however I like and carry whichever mini-collection(s) I want with me when I go do what people do when they have portable music players…

Too much coffee

I drank too much coffee. I know you know what happens to the stupid fool who drinks too much coffee. If you don't know, it is too gross to discuss here, and I will not indulge your disgusting purile voyerism, sicko.

That's all. Thanks for reading, assuming you did. If you didn't then fuck you. Jenn: I'll go tag you, you're pithey.

My D&D alter-ego

2005-10-15T17:59:00.000-07:00

Y'all may be interested in how I filled out the personality test mentioned in (below, I guess) previous articles:

-r

I Am A: Chaotic Good Elf Mage Fighter

Alignment:
Chaotic Good characters are independent types with a strong belief in the value of goodness. They have little use for governments and other forces of order, and will generally do their own things, without heed to such groups.

Race:
Elves are the eldest of all races, although they are generally a bit smaller than humans. They are generally well-cultured, artistic, easy-going, and because of their long lives, unconcerned with day-to-day activities that other races frequently concern themselves with. Elves are, effectively, immortal, although they can be killed. After a thousand years or so, they simply pass on to the next plane of existance.

Primary Class:
Mages harness the magical energies for their own use. Spells, spell books, and long hours in the library are their loves. While often not physically strong, their mental talents can make up for this.

Secondary Class:
Fighters are the warriors. They use weapons to accomplish their goals. This isn't to say that they aren't intelligent, but that they do, in fact, believe that violence is frequently the answer.

Deity:
none was listed

Find out What D&D Character Are You?, courtesy ofNeppyMan (e-mail)

According to the stats listed below all this stuff, I could just as easily have been called a 'cleric' as opposed to 'fighter' if that matters, because both had scores of 3 and the program seems to have arbitrarily (or because it was first?) chosen 'fighter' but I'm happy either way.

-=-

Which D&D Character is Mrs. Savage?

2005-10-15T17:55:00.000-07:00

There is a link below to the site I used, and Mrs. Savage walked in while I was looking through the 'personality test' for D&D character and alignment, etc. I think it is interesting, some of this stuff looks like what The Zombie Slayer and I've discussed in the past. So it may apply equally well to him. ZS: If you read this, I encourage you to take the quiz and post your results.
-r

I Am A: Chaotic Good GnomeRanger Bard

Alignment:
Chaotic Good characters are independent types with a strong belief in the value of goodness. They have little use for governments and other forces of order, and will generally do their own things, without heed to such groups.

Race:
Gnomes are also short, like dwarves, but much skinnier. They have no beards, and are very inclined towards technology, although they have been known to dabble in magic, too. They tend to be fun-loving and fond of jokes and humor. Some gnomes live underground, and some live in cities and villages. They are very tolerant of other races, and are generally well-liked, though occasionally considered frivolous.

Primary Class:
Rangers are the defenders of nature and the elements. They are in tune with the Earth, and work to keep it safe and healthy.

Secondary Class:
Bards are the entertainers. They sing, dance, and play instruments to make other people happy, and, frequently, make money. They also tend to dabble in magic a bit.

Deity:
Baervan Wildwanderer is the Neutral Good gnomish god of forests, travel, and nature. He is also known as the Masked Leaf. His avatar is always accompanied by an intelligent, giant raccoon, named Chiktikka Fastpaws. His followers, like him, enjoy the outdoors and work to protect it and guard those who also enjoy it. Their preferred weapon is the halfspear.

Find out What D&D Character Are You?, courtesy ofNeppyMan (e-mail)

-=-

I've been away

2005-10-15T17:30:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry, everyone. I've been away. I've been trying to relearn (though it feels like I'm learning it for the first time, I must be getting old, that's all I can say in my defense) Java. I know you'd think I'd actually need a computer for that, but you'd be wrong. All I need are a few books and ALOT OF PAPER. Pluswhich, free time and then I have to tear myself away from it an do something completely arbitrary so my mind can percolate, whatever. I find playing Pokémon Crystalélately, this iséis good for this, that, and reading, of course.

I'll try to think of something really stupid to write about and get back to y'all. Yes, I'm sorry: I am a Slacker: I love Richard Linkletter, as a matter of fact. yep, I'm even due for a 're-screaning' of that video (I even own a version of the 'screenplay').
More later.
-r

PS: Thanks to everyone who reads these words! Check out the skeptics, that's what I always do!

Right now my mind is percolating on some kind of role-playing adventure game, I mean, whose mind isn't constantly constructing other worlds and potential human/creature inhabitants of said worlds?

-=-

ReadMyList: New Blog

2005-09-18T02:20:00.000-07:00

I made a short list of people I know with two ingredients for making great pasta: They can read and they have internet access. Maybe those aren't the ingredients for making great pasta. Maybe the ingredients for making great pasta is to go out to eat. Or have Rob cook.
-r
Meanwhile…

I started a new 'blog… And, jus' fer kicks, I invited a couple of my more literate friends to join (read: I asked all of my friends, [read: I asked 3 guys I know]).

To begin, I went room to room in the apartment and found all the books I'm reading right now (half a dozen came from the library today — my reserves came in — woohoo!), and I made an unordered list (<ul>…</ul> !?!?) of them all, carefully linking them to my bookstore. Go! Check it out: ReadMyList: A literate 'blog
-=-

Aussie News

2005-09-17T03:25:00.000-07:00

A View From Downunder…

Wealthy sweat on tax probe
Craig Binnie
17sep05
First, read this article from the Herald-Sun.

Here is my response:

It seems this probe is far-reaching. It also seems to be a well-known thing that in the US, the wealthy are guilty of tax evasion, fraud, etc. Probabilistically, what do you think the chances are of a probe such as this article describes, occuring in the States?
-r
PS:
Myself, I'd guess that the probability is lower than that of my own self winning the lottery (I don't buy tickets). I suggest such a low probability (someone'd have to give me a winning ticket, somehow, or I'd have to find it), because it appears obvious to this observer that the corporations OWN the government here.
I could be wrong (and I hope I am).

—What do ya'all think?

PS: I added this to keep ZS happy. He seems to think I'm neglectful of my 'blog. I'm sorry, ZS. Zombieslayer is my master
-=-

Uni stands firm on terror exhibition
Jen Kelly
17sep05
Second, read this article from the Herald-Sun.

Here is my response:

Sounds like any excuse to hinder freedom of speech will do these days. Censorship is censorship.

—What do ya'all think?

PS: I added this to keep ZS happy. He seems to think I'm neglectful of my 'blog. I'm sorry, ZS. Zombieslayer is my master
-=-

Agreement on freeway's frozen millions
Jeremy Kelly and Fleur Leyden
17sep05
Third, read this article from the Herald-Sun.

Here is my response:

This is quite a mixed up bag of political horseshit, non?
I see one thing to actively and bitterly complain about: Using someone else's broken promise to make a demand of public money seems lame. But I don't know the whole story here. Actually it would seem the Aussies have a better system for dealing with road money. But I don't even have the VAGUEST idea what our own system is. For all I know, it's far superior! *shrugs*

—What do ya'all think?

PS: I added this to keep ZS happy. He seems to think I'm neglectful of my 'blog. I'm sorry, ZS. Zombieslayer is my master
-=-

(I promise the next one is good!)Pet project aids the elderly
Jordana Borensztajn
13sep05
Lastly, read this article from the Herald-Sun.

Here is my response:

That dog's name is 'Mintie'? I want to eat that lil dog. Why do people have dogs that size? Haven't they ever heard of hamsters? I absolutely HATE little dogs. They are worthless as hell. In fact, HELL, is NOTABLY WORTH MORE THAN THESE MUTANT PUPS. Case in point: Ya kin use h-e-double-hockey-sticks to scare Christians and small children straight. (In honor of this, I've renamed the 2 aug page of this blog… …actually, I renamed all the entries.) Ohkay, that said, I see two sides to this and one is my robot-with-a-heart-of-stone response: So the old farts do better with animals so we let them have animals then because they're too old and infirm, they neglect or have to surrender the animals back to shelters (or the little suckers die)… so these dudes come swooping in to care and feed the animals that are there to keep the old farts, who live alone, alive longer in the first place. Maybe we can solve the problem if we take away the pets? I mean if the old putzes die, there'll be no need to give them pets and there'll be (again) no need to take care of said pets. Why not a big communal old fart farm? Ya kin keep alda oldies in one great big … hell with it.
The truth of the matter, is that I often quote the thing about how old people do better with pets, but not because I'm necessarily ADVOCATING pets for the elderly, so much as I'm advocating pets for MYSELF, in general. But I'm really making a comment on how you'll tend to thrive if someone, apparently ANYONE, depends on you (note, 'ancient' tribal leaders from Native American lore: Because they were the respected elders, they lived much longer than the common loser tribesman)… but it seems a little far-fetched—nay—artificial, to keep people alive through this psychological warfare of having a small animal depend on them, ESPECIALLY, when the damn animal CAN'T DEPEND ON THEM (hense the swooping)!!!! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS? A social program to save another disaster of a social program? CAN I GIT SOME SOCIAL PROGRAM CHAINING, PLEASE?!!?
-r
PS: Disagree with me if you want, but don't expect me to share my tinydog sandwich.

—What do ya'all think?

PS: I added this to keep ZS happy. He seems to think I'm neglectful of my 'blog. I'm sorry, ZS. Zombieslayer is my master
-=-

Fuckin' Liberal-conservatives

2005-09-07T02:00:00.000-07:00

classic email volley

To: Zombieslayer
From: savage

Subject: Re: some help here?

I'm going to post this, I'll excise your 'biblical-sounding' name and replace it with 'something-more-appropriate,' same with Mrs.ZS's 'koenig-esque' name and replace it with (obviously) Mrs.'something-more-appropriate'—

I'll also turn someone into 'Him-of-the-red-suspenders' or maybe I'll say: 'Host-of-Micless-open-mic'
-r
PS:
whatever…
PPS:
I'll also remove the reference to your email addy (of course)

BLOGGERS: This is the bloggy-pi-bin-reverse-polish-notation email system speaking: "Clearly, these emails are in reverse-order. Imagine it was done on purpose, like 'Pulp Fiction,' yeah?"

-=-

--- The Zombieslayer wrote:

> Rob,
> I'm 100% in agreement here. Not all conservatives
> are Republicans. I'm
> economically conservative but I can't remember the
> last time I voted for a
> Republican anything. Ah yes, it was either '88 or
> '92 when I voted for
> Pete Wilson. Now, that was a huge mistake. Being
> a big proponent of
> abortion (not pro-choice, I'm pro-abortion. The
> Jerry Springer show is
> proof that abortion isn't used enough), you can see
> why I so rarely vote
> for Republican anything.
>
> And likewise, a lot of liberals voted for Nader,
> Mrs.ZS being one of them.
> She calls herself either liberal or Green, but she
> hated the current crop
> of Democrats.
>
> -The ZombieSlayer (is your master, bow you wretched fleshbag!)
>
> The Computer Guy said:
> > I don't think you'd like it. "intellectual
> > conservative" is neither, I think, intellectual
> NOR
> > conservative. I'm not really able to
> self-identify
> > with whatever, maybe not even 'intellectual,' but
> I
> > think they're making the common mistake that...
> > conservative = republican
> > and
> > republican = conservative
> > -r
> > PS:
> > Red-suspenders is doing the same thing and if he isn't
> > conservative and/or republican, that only means it
> is
> > worse, because then he's doing this...
> > liberal = democrat
> > and
> > democrat = liberal
> > and you don't have to be a zombie to know that
> that is
> > just WRONG. on so many levels. but I'll spell my
> > personal problem with it. Hey: 'problem' has
> > contained withing it the word 'rob' … I wondered
> > what the fuck was wrong here.
> >
> > anyway my issue with d = l and l = d is that Bush
> Sr.
> > called Dukakis (how to spell, who cares, whatever)
> a
> > 'liberal,' as if it were a bad name and D (fuckin'
> > spellin') tried to ... shit, what do you call it
> when
> > someone else makes a fallacy in a debate and you
> try
> > to call their attention to it by making the
> converse
> > statement? ... anyway, so D says to Bush Sr.,
> > basically, 'fine, if I'm a liberal, you're a
> > conservative' -- *sighs*
> > he called him poopy head.
> > ...
> > my problem with a 'liberal' or a 'democrat' and
> > especially a 'democrat' calling themself a
> 'liberal'
> > is that they're playing into the bullshit started
> by
> > their own opposition!
> > :(
> > and now I just got my hands (fingers?) dirty by
> > talking about it!
> > blah and double blah.
> > maybe I'll post this.
> > -=-
> >
>
>
> --
> Check out the Zombieslayer blog, the internet
> website that just might save
> your life:
> Zombieslayer is my master
>
>
-----
Me again:
No, I don't know anything about politics.
-r
PS:
Not even a little bit.
I thank you politely—though briskly ("Fuggoff") for visiting.
-=-

2005-09-04T01:30:00.000-07:00

We hope you enjoy your exploration of Martinique.

The election scheduled for May 11 would not take place.

MT. PELÉE ERUPTION (1902)

First, a few facts:
Mt. Pelée is an active volcano on on the North end of the island of Martinique. Martinique is part of the Lesser Antilles volcanic arc. The arc is formed by the subduction of the North American Plate under the Caribbean Plate. Mt. Pelée, is called a stratovolcano and is made mostly of pyroclastic rocks.

The above is from this page. and my memories of other things found in my recent research after reading for M's class from the class packet.

The most recent eruption of Mt. Pelée was from 1929 to 1932. "Mt. Pelée is famous for the May 8, 1902 eruption which killed 29,000 people and destroyed the city of St. Pierre. This is the largest number of casualities for a volcanic eruption this century."-same

(from Wiki) "The study of the causes of the disaster marks the beginning of modern volcanology with the definition and the analysis of the deadliest volcanic hazard: the pyroclastic flows and surges, also called 'nuées ardentes' (Fr: glowing clouds). The eruption has also lent its name to 'The Pelean eruption style'."

My interest?
(da da dum!)

The Election of May 11th, 1902

Volcanic eruption of 1902
"Nothing in the past of Mount-Pelé let predict such a dramatic eruption.é Few volcanic phenomena observed before, did not convince the inhabitants of the importance of the danger.é However, May 8, 1902, the crater explodes.é In a few seconds, a volcanic cloud shaves any trace of life on 60km2. 30000 people perish."-here
ohkay, so you know that the city was destroyed…

But this wasn't like a sudden thing! The most obvious clue (to the modern observer, this is admittedly a post-hoc argument, but anyway) is that the mountain IS A VOLCANO. Just to get that out of the way. However, it hadn't done ANYTHING in recent (to the people at the beginning of the twentieth century) history to suggest it was anything other than some kind of sleeping dragon, or stone dragon, whatever, anyway…

January/Febuary 2002: Sulferous smell emanates from mountain and annoys residents of St. Pierre. But no one seems to notice or worry. The American Consul's wife wrote to her sister in Ma about it, but *sighs* it wasn't like she was worried about dying, it was just hard to breathe, ya know?
-r
PS:
the remaining stuff is from this site. It is copied and pasted and then I edited the format so it wouldn't look too weird. (JUST A REPRINT — but pay attention to the election stuff, please, as that is really the topic here)…
-=-

"Although in January 1902 Mt. Pelée began to show an abrupt increase in fumarole activity, the public showed little concern."-this site see below:

OVERVIEW: The Tropical Paradise of St. Pierre
The infamous volcano of Mt. Pelée, shown in this 1987 photo, looms over the village of St. Pierre on the French Caribbean Island of Martinique. This sleepy little village shows little of the grandeur of turn-of-the-century St. Pierre, which was a vibrant colonial city, known to European tourists as the "Paris of the West Indies." With its red-tiled cottages, rambling streets, and tropical vegetation, this prosperous little city was renowned for its beauty. In the official 1894 census, the population of St. Pierre was around 20,000. Although most were native Martiniquans, the wealth and political power were controlled largely by Creoles and a few French colonial officials and civil servants. No one at the time could have predicted the horror that was to descend on this tropical paradise with the reawakening of Mt. Pelée in the Spring of 1902.

PARADISE TURNS TO HELL

Although in January 1902 Mt. Pelée began to show an abrupt increase in fumarole activity, the public showed little concern. This changed, however, on April 23 when minor explosions began at the summit of the volcano. Over the next few days, St. Pierre was rocked by earth tremors, showered in ash, and enveloped in a thick cloud of choking sulfurous gas. These nightmarish conditions deteriorated further when the city and outlying villages were invaded by ground-dwelling insects and snakes driven from the slopes of Mt. Pelée by the ashfalls and tremors. Horses, pigs, and dogs screamed as red ants and foot-long centipedes crawled up their legs and bit them. Thousands of poisonous snakes joined the fray. An estimated 50 humans, mostly children, died by the snake bites, along with some 200 animals.

As the summit eruptions intensified, water in the Etang Sec crater lake was heated to near boiling. On May 5, the crater rim gave way, sending a torrent of scalding water cascading down the River Blanche. The hot water mixed with loose pyroclastic debris to generate a massive lahar with a downslope speed of nearly 100 kilometers per hour. This large volcanic mudflow buried everything in its path. Near the mouth of the river, north of St. Pierre, it overran a rum distillery, killing 23 workmen. The lahar continued into the sea, where it generated a three-meter-high tsunami which flooded the low-lying areas along the waterfront of St. Pierre.

THE ELECTION

Living near the volcano became increasingly stressful, leading many to consider leaving St. Pierre for Martinique's second city, Fort-de-France. On the day of the lahar, however, Governor Louis Mouttet received a report from a committee of civic leaders who climbed the volcano to assess the danger. The only scientist in the group was a local high school teacher. The report stated that "there is nothing in the activity of Mt. Pelée that warrants a departure from St. Pierre." It concluded that "the safety of St. Pierre is completely assured." The report eased the public's fears, and gave hope to city officials who were particularly anxious that voters remain in the city to cast their ballots for an election that was to be held on May 11. The only people with enough money to leave the island were the wealthy, nearly all of which belonged to the Progressive Party of Governor Mouttet. Mouttet convinced the conservative editor of the daily newspaper Les Coloniesto downplay the danger of the volcano, and to lead the effort to encourage people to remain. Still, some residents left the city for Fort-de-France. This prompted Governor Mouttet to send in troops to patrol the road to Fort-de-France, with orders to turn back refugees who were trying to leave. Based on the soothing articles that appeared in Les Colonies, many people in the countryside flocked to St. Pierre thinking that it was the safest place to be. The population ballooned to about 28,000, nearly all of which would perish in the cataclysmic eruption of May 8.

THE ERUPTION OF MAY 8, 1902

The election scheduled for May 11 would not take place. The report issued by the investigating committee on May 5, failed to realize the potential danger of a large V-shaped notch cut through cliffs surrounding the summit crater. The notch was like a colossal gun sight pointing directly at St. Pierre four miles below. At about 7:50 a.m. on May 8, the volcano erupted with a deafening roar. A large black cloud composed of superheated gas, ash and rock rolled headlong down the south flank of Mt. Pelée at more than 100 miles per hour, its path directed by the V-shaped notch at the summit. In less than one minute it struck St. Pierre with hurricane force. The blast was powerful enough to carry a three-ton statue sixteen meters from its mount. One-meter-thick masonary walls were blown into rubble and support girders were mangled into twisted strands of metal. The searing heat of the cloud ignited huge bonfires. Thousands of barrels of rum stored in the city's warehouses exploded, sending rivers of the flaming liquid through the streets and into the sea. The cloud continued to advanced over the harbor where it destroyed at least twenty ships anchored offshore. The hurricane force of the blast capsized the steamship Grappler, and its scorching heat set ablaze the American sailing ship Roraima, killing most of her passengers and crew. The Roraima had the misfortune of arriving only a few hours before the eruption. Those on on board could only watch in horror as the cloud descended on them after annihilating the city of St. Pierre. Of the ~28,000 people in St. Pierre, there were only two known survivors.


The remains of St. Pierre	Nuée Ardente from Mt. Pelée

The dynamic cloud of hot gases and incandescent solid particles that destroyed St. Pierre was a pyroclastic flow, a feature that was unknown to science at the time. Subsequent examples observed on Mt. Pelée were described by French volcanologists as nuée ardentes, or glowing clouds.

John Allen Paulos wants you to understand probability

2005-08-30T12:30:00.000-07:00

Math Illiteracy

Innumeracy, pt. 1

I was reading the quixtar blog (I know, I have an obsession, knowing about it is the first step) and found people (in the comments) supporting the quality and price of the (amway/quixtar) products (they're overpriced and don't fair well on the open market — consumer reports, for one thing, rates its soap sub-par and 5 times too expersive, etc.)…

Hense this article (which is just a reprint of a comment I made at the quixtar blog — deal with it)

I find it difficult to believe these people believe this stuff. I always thought that stuff like cults and RSP (really stupid people, ex. Columbine kids' parents: where were they while their kids were sawing guns in the garage?) were either a) a hoax or very far away… but for the third time, I've had to deal with these people.

The 'business opportunity' the 'buy from yourself, for credibility' it's such crap: If you ran a grocery store and DIDN'T buy from yourself, people like this would say you have a credibility problem, but they're OBVIOUSLY assuming that the grocery store guy must be BUYING FROM A COMPETITOR. What kind of FOOL buys groceries at retail when they have access to wholesale prices?
-r
PS:
I work with computers. Frequently I find that I can save money if I buy 30 motherboards (an example) instead of 3. Normally, I don't have to buy that many, but there is a critical number where you have extra motherboards, but you still saved money — even if you don't use the extra ones. This is because when you take a product from a wholesaler (not distributer, the numbers will be different) you TYPICALLY multiply the price by a factor of 2.5 — OR MORE — I'll illustrate: (no, the numbers are just example numbers, they don't represent any real products, this is a simple math example)

1 motherboard, retail, $100
30 motherboards, retail, $3,000 (30x100, get it?)
30 motherboards, wholesale, $1,200 (…at this rate…)
1 motherboard, wholesale, $40

So, if you need 12 or more motherboards, it is immediately and clearly better if you can try to get a wholesale deal. This is the OBVIOUS point. (You even end up with 18 count 'em EIGHT-TEEN extra motherboards: That's a spare motherboard for each of the original 12, PLUS an additional spare for half of the original dozen!)

The less obvious point is that if you can get them for $40, you can ALWAYS try to sell them for $40.25 plus shipping. So the extra motherboards, even if you give them away don't cost a dime, but if you don't give them away, you'd make a profit. The only issue is, and this is for normal consumers: Most of the people don't have the $1200 and so $100 is the price they pay. Get together with 11 of your friends some time and make a small business — You don't need Amway.

(I used the same numbers, compare: 40x30 = 1200; (x) times 2.5 = 100 -> (x) = 100 divided by 2.5 -> (x) = 40)

What you need is to not be number-stupid. Innumeracy is the problem. Read the John Allen Paulos book.
PPS:
I may have to edit/modify this post. If so, I'm sorry. The reason is that I will undoubtably have more examples. Because I want to make a series of these 'Innumeracy' articles and I think we all profit from more examples. There is always the possibility that one example will make sense to you more than another and that another people will identify with a different example. So any ideas would be appreciated.
-=-

Hey Rob, Believe in Good People, please?

2005-08-21T12:00:00.000-07:00

This is going to be a weird blog.

Because blogger posts things in the order I feed it (or if I lie to it about the times...) I have to feed it information in the reverse order or you'll get the end first and the beginning last and though that style may work for some stories ... it really would ruin this one.

I'm going to lie about this post and say it happened at noon on sunday. Everything good should happen at Noon on Sunday.
-r
This is the first.
PS:
I hope I don't screw up the order.

Some of these will be complete drafts of emails I've received or sent — I will dis-allow comments for those. I'll put a little blurb between them so we can comment.
I'm doing this so I can keep up with y'all, not for censorship. Say whatever pleases you, where-ever it fits or suits your fancy. but, I want the emails to stand on their own.
-=-

2005-08-20T03:38:00.000-07:00

This is the second.
This is where I'll type up the back-story.
Please feel free (and by that, I mean: please!!! please!!! please!!!) comment on any section you feel like commenting on.

I really need the feedback. I can't believe the world I live in sometimes!
-r
PS:
I'm going to post this with the correct/current time (Around 3:30 on Saturday Morning).

Backstory…
In the middle of January, I moved with my girlfriend to Northern California because CSU, Chico admitted her for the Spring/2005 semester. I didn't know what I'd do for work, but I hoped that I'd figure something out when I got there (sorry, here).

One of the problems I've already mentioned here and it can be easily phrased as: "pride." After being your own boss, doing something you love doing and feeling like you are helping people and making enough money to support your CD and video lust… you can see how being chronicly unemployed would kind of hurt. But after that, I found short-lived success as a programmer and I loved that even more, because impressing people with my brain suits me REAL WELL. Plus the money was pretty good.

*sighs* Where was I? Oh, yeah:
Anyway, Chico. This 100k people town fancies itself a small town. Until I got here, they didn't have craig's list or even Trader Joe's (Trader Joe's is scheduled to open in Nov. 2005 or after the holidays -- you're welcome, Chico). But being a town with a college, many starving or whatever college students are willing to do my job as interns or whatever and I'm kind of rather stuck. Stuck between a large rock and pride. Or something. I used up all my metaphors earlier tonight, as you shall see.

Ohkay, so — Eventually craigslist came to Chico and I posted an ad for services offered: "computer consulting" (dead air, or for you nature lovers, the sounds of crickets gently chirping, if I drop a pin… you get the idea)— so a week later, I posted my resumé and again nothing. The phone would ring and it'd be: dead air (come back to rub it in?) or for someone else who apparently used to have the number or selling something or a fax selling something. Even the volume of my spam didn't change!

One day, (actually this was last Monday), I finally got an email. Of course I thought it was spam, however, the subject was "database programmer" which was the same as the title I gave my resumé on craigslist. I'll post this email here, as exhibit A, I'll tell the thing I've traveled back in time one minute (3:37AM, Aug 20, 2005)
-=-

2005-08-20T03:37:00.000-07:00

(The usual Yahoo mail stuff is on the top and left…) — I wish I could include a banner-ad so it'd be more realistic!
Enjoy!

This message is not flagged. [ Flag message - Mark as Unread ]

From:	"Dominick Chiricosta" Add to Address Book
To:	r.wesley@edwards.net
Subject:	Database Programmer
Date:	Mon, 15 Aug 2005 14:04:25 -0700

Hello Robert,

My name is Dominick Chiricosta. Once a victim of corporate downsizing, but no more!

A friend of mine recommended that I look at craiglist.com to find people who might be in a similar situation or just looking for a change and want to move on: 1) looking to generate some extra income, or 2) interested in an opportunity to significantly improve their current situation.

What you had to say in your note/resume, captured my interest! Can't promise you anything, but possibly I can help.

After 30+ years in Corporate America (Computer Systems / IT Services Management / Management Consulting), getting downsized several times, and spending a lot of time and energy looking for another JOB (just over broke); I finally took command of my financial future. I have teamed up with some business people and close friends of mine from the Bay Area and am establishing a web-based, Interactive Commerce ™ business. We have applied our combined skills and experiences to create a unique business model and, we solved the problem with “stickiness” for the typical “dot com” business!

Our business is legal, ethical, and moral. It is anchored on free enterprise principles, a win-win philosophy, and conservative principles and values. We plan to expand the business internationally and are looking for a few motivated people (P/T or F/T) who want more out of life than “just survive”. Individuals or couples who are team players, not afraid of change, willing to learn, flexible, have a desire to win, want to make a difference, and will make the effort to do the necessary work to achieve their goals.

If you consider yourself to be this type of person or would like more information, contact me so that we can set up a detailed discussion of my needs, your interest and goals, and determine if there is a mutual interest for us to work together.

dnrchiricosta@sbcglobal.net

“Whether we spend life winning or loosing depends on how we use our mind-sight – what we choose to ‘see’ or to ‘dream’”. Dr. David J. Schwartz

2005-08-20T03:33:00.000-07:00

I'll go back in time another 4 minutes, 3:33AM on Saturday — half-way to Hell. Maybe.
-r
PS:
Anyway, getting this email, I knew that the person had seen my resumé and it wasn't spam, or, if it was, it wasn't yer typical spam. Whatever.

You will notice that I missed a few red flags here. Ten points to the one (not ZS, he's seen these before; not M, either, so's she) who spots the most red flags.

Better! Ten points PER red flag. Be creative. What should have tipped my dumb-ass off?
PPS: You all win if you even get ONE. Because at this point I had nada.
-----
The next post is (or should be) my responce to that first email and I'll go back in time a good 3 minutes so I'll be at the half-hour. Then I'll use simple 15-minute increments. Assuming I spelled that correctly. ;)
-=-

2005-08-20T03:30:00.000-07:00

Date:	Tue, 16 Aug 2005 14:39:10 -0700 (PDT)
From:	"The Computer Guy" Add to Address Book
Subject:	Re: Database Programmer
To:	"Dominick Chiricosta"

I have been a computer consultant since before I
graduated high school (I didn't call myself that back
then, I just helped people with their computers and
was happy that they 'helped' me back with checks!).

Long ago (even before Jr. High), I've been programming
as a hobby.  I've picked up many languages -- so many,
in fact, that I think they're all pretty much the same
(that is, learning a new language is ridiculously
easy) I learned PHP and Perl in what seemed like
overnight (helps that they are essentially identical).

The thing I'm really tired of is managers (or project
managers) who don't program at all.  I VERY BRIEFLY
programmed for a guy (he'd say 'company') in Costa
Mesa who was trying to be a middle-man for e-commerce
websites.  His company made PHP-based templates for
and then created tools to help customers modify the
templates.  (I don't understand, for instance, why the
customers don't just hire a couple programmers to set
the thing up and then consult with them a couple times
a month; adding inventory to the database can either
be taught to a janitor or ... simply interface the
database with whatever system they use to keep track
of inventory in the first place) ... ANYWAY: it was a
disaster.  After the first day, when I did something
his other programmers had apparently told him couldn't
be done, he apparently expected miracles.  But I had
yet to learn his existing code!  I think I lasted like
3 days!  two and a half, actually.  He called me a
'wanna-be' ... funny, since he kept saying he doesn't
program.  If he /did/ program, he'd know that
maintenance is /harder/ than straight coding because
writing a program is just a matter of knowing the
language and (at most) having a handy manual (O'Reilly
is good).  He'd know that when a programmer is dropped
into the sea of someone else's code, they have a new
learning curve.  It may be true that I can read PHP,
but the longer the program is, the more I need to
study it.
Like "Just because I'm an architect, standing on your
lawn, doesn't mean I know where your closets are
before I've walked through your house, much less
before I've even been inside.

*sighs*
Tell me what I can do for you, I'll try to help.
-r
PS:
I'm near the University in Chico (95926).  I could
probably do any programming or database work from here
(we have a Mandrivia workstation and an IBM thinkpad
with WinME) or figure something out.  I am not opposed
to travel, I'd just need more information.
-=-

--- Dominick Chiricosta <dnrchiricosta@sbcglobal.net>
wrote:

> Hello Robert,
>
>
>
> My name is Dominick Chiricosta.  Once a victim of
> corporate downsizing, but no more!
>
>
>
> A friend of mine recommended that I look at
>
(((   Here, it reproduced the text of his first email to me, we can skip it.   )))

>
> dnrchiricosta@sbcglobal.net
>
>
>
> "Whether we spend life winning or loosing depends on
> how we use our mind-sight - what we choose to 'see'
> or to 'dream'".  Dr. David J. Schwartz
>
>
>

---------------------------------
* Human Language Research *
*  ~e                     * A not-for-profit organization
*  http://www.uhlc.org   *
UHLC: Everybody's Talking
---------------------------------

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam?  Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection
around
http://mail.yahoo.com

2005-08-20T03:15:00.000-07:00

…As you can see, I suspect nothing. I am really embarrassed! It isn't like I have ZERO experience with this sort of thing. Quite the contrary! I've come across these folks and their damage on at least 3 other occasions! But I won't spoil it for you.
-r
PS:
This is so we all can comment (assuming anyone is reading this at all).
Thanks to those who are.
Thanks very much.
I mean that!

"May the power of positive thinking bring you riches and 90+ virgins to dote on your every gluttonous whim!"
-Rob

PPS: I'll post the next email and my reply in quick succession and then we'll have a comments section again. I know what I said: I lied.
-=-

2005-08-20T03:01:00.000-07:00

This message is not flagged. [ Flag Message - Mark as Unread ]

From:	"Dominick Chiricosta" Add to Address Book
To:	R.Wesley@Edwards.Net
Subject:	Re: Database Programmer
Date:	Tue, 16 Aug 2005 16:05:15 -0700

Hi Robert,

I enjoyed reading about your experiences trying to help people with their
problems, etc....we have some things in common to share!

I live near Lake Oroville and it would be best if we meet
to talk about my needs, your interests and goals, and to determine if there
is a mutual interest for us to working together.

I'll come up to Chico; pick a place and a couple of time
slots either on Thursday or Friday of this week, and I'll meet you there.

Looking forward to our meeting,

Dominick Chiricosta
D&R Associates International - A Business for the 21st Century
E-mail: dnrassocintl@dnaintl.com
Web:   www.dnaintl.com   (Access Code - 923435a)
VM:     866 693 0169
Ofc:     530 589 4394

2005-08-20T02:59:00.000-07:00

Date: Wed, 17 Aug 2005 00:33:42 -0700 (PDT)
From: "The Computer Guy" Add to Address BookAdd to Address Book
Subject: Re: Database Programmer
To: "Dominick Chiricosta"

I have to figure out a couple things. I'll definately
know by tomorrow, about time slots (it is Tuesday PM).
One of the things I need to figure out is how casual
our meeting is supposed to be so I'll know if it is
appropriate for my girlfriend to accompany me.

But, as far as location, there is a cafe in downtown
Chico called The Naked Lounge. We, of course, being
new here ourselves, didn't know about it. She was
doing an interview with another student for a paper
she was writing and he suggested that place and it was
a good place to have an interview -- a conversation.
It is close to Subway, on the opposite side of the
street from the parking lot (which is like a block
away from Subway). As far as the name, it seems an
unfortunate name, because when this person suggested
meeting there, I thought he was asking my girlfriend
to meet him at a strip club! *ha!*

If I haven't called you or emailed you by the time you
read this, some of my work is 'officially released' on
one of my "blogs" (actually I hate that word, but
everyone keeps using it so I'm folding):
http://jsepresents.blogspot.com/

I use JavaScript for these arbitrary cases because it
is easy to test (just open up firefox and, if
necessary, run the javascript console).

I made a weird mistake, I think, with my last 'job'
working in Costa Mesa. When I went in for the
interview, the guy basically said: "can you start
now?" (he meant 'today,' as in 'right now' and so I
did) ... that was a Thursday morning. Later that day,
because I'd been ribbed by everyone about being
'unemployed' or whatever and for some reason felt like
acting out *laughs* I was a jerk to my girlfriend:
"ha! I have a job, so there!" (I don't remember what I
said, exactly, but it was childish.) The point is,
when, early the next week, I was called a 'wanna-be'
and 'what a waste' and fired ... well, I had to eat
crow with my girlfriend, who didn't really deserve my
outburst in the first place. The reason I'm telling
you this is that EVEN STILL, she asks me if there was
any advance notice of the end. And, aside from his
expecting water-into-wine-like programming, which I
didn't see coming until about 90 minutes before the
other shoe fell, I would have to say the only
"strange" thing was his casual attitude coupled with
his insistance that he isn't a programmer (in fact, he
said he isn't a 'coder,' which is odd; because
non-programmers don't usually use that word -- I, too,
hardly, if ever, call myself a 'developer' or 'coder.'

What I'm trying to suggest is that perhaps I need a
better judge of character. Then again, I think I've
finally learned that it is a myth that knowing what
you're doing and being good at it means you'll be
successful. Your own comment about "J.O.B"
"... looking for another JOB (just over broke)..."
makes me think you'll appreciate these words.
-r
PS:
If I don't call you first, you can call us here:
714.767.8075
(We still use the Orange County cell phone -- everyone
knows the number, so...) ... plus, we mostly only have
a local phone number for internet access and sending
faxes.

Thanks for getting back to me and thanks, too (in case
I haven't said so already) for contacting me in the
first place.
-=-

--- Dominick Chiricosta
wrote:

> Hi Robert,
>
> I enjoyed reading about your experiences trying to
>

( ( ( As per usual, it re-produced his entire email here. ) ) )

>
> Looking forward to our meeting,
>
> Dominick Chiricosta
> D&R Associates International - A Business for the
> 21st Century
> E-mail: dnrassocintl@dnaintl.com
> Web: www.dnaintl.com (Access Code - 923435a)
> VM: 866 693 0169
> Ofc: 530 589 4394
>
>

---------------------------------
* Human Language Research *
* ~e * A not-for-profit organization
* <H\ UNIVERSAL HUMAN * dedicated to the fulfillment
* _/ )_ LANGUAGE CODE * of humankind's destiny of a
* * universal language.
* THE GODDESS *
* of UHLC *
* ** http://www.uhlc.org *
UHLC: Everybody's Talking
---------------------------------

( ( ( bloggers: do you like my signature? ) ) )

__________________________________________________
Do You Yahoo!?
Tired of spam? Yahoo! Mail has the best spam protection
around
http://mail.yahoo.com

2005-08-20T02:15:00.000-07:00

WOW!
Re-reading that email, I actually gave this guy an opportunity to get out while he still had some dignity. And this was before I knew what he was (what he is)!
-r
PS:
Please comment on both of the above emails here.
Also, do you like my signature?
Too much Ego?
You should read my manifesto! (if you do, keep in mind it was written BEFORE 9/11 but I may not change it if it wasn't; I've learned more since then)…
PPS:
Again, ten points for every red flag or subtle hint that I should've known, etc.

Don't worry, I already know I'm not the sharpest tack in the jar, so it isn't like you can hurt my feelings like that. No, really, I mean it!

( again, the next two emails will come together. But I telephoned him to decide on the time [and place -- this is odd, because I told him the place in the ABOVE email -- hmm] to that end, the doughnut shop across the street, 10AM; again, ENJOY!)
-=-

2005-08-20T02:01:00.000-07:00

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From:	"Dominick Chiricosta" Add to Address Book
To:	R.Wesley@Edwards.Net
Subject:	Re: Database Programmer
Date:	Wed, 17 Aug 2005 17:43:19 -0700

Hi Robert,

Business casual is what I'll be wearing.  It's too hot for a suit and tie!
....and yes, bring you girl friend along.  It's always best to have multiple
people -- different individuals > different perspectives, etc.

By the way we lived in OC - Lake Forest - for 14 years.  Moved up this way
in 1990.

Dominick

( ( (   This time my previous email followed; I've omitted it, you can see it above…   ) ) )

2005-08-20T01:45:00.000-07:00

Holy cow!

I guess I didn't see that email until after we made the arrangement over the phone. So we can comment here, I guess. The next two emails came together in my email. But I was doing a little research of my own. Had I been using a computer for said research, I'd have read and probably responded to his emails, who knows. Instead, I was on the phone with my friend in L.A. who is like a networking guru. If you're reading this, Jeff, I hope you know I mean that in the best possible way. Ya see, my friend seems to have a natural gift for making connections and seeing how people can help each-other. It helps that I almost NEVER hear him utter an unkind or negative word about anyone. After I told him that I've never heard him utter an unkind word, TWICE in the week that followed I actually heard him utter unkind and negative words, one was a really crazy/evil woman he tried to set up an office with and the other was a lazy/thieving ex-girlfriend of mine. It isn't that they both didn't deserve it, it was just out of character for him. I've known him over 10 years and had so when this happened, too.
-r
PS:
Where was I?

Oh, yeah. THE MEETING (da dum!)
Ohkay, so my girlfriend and I were 5 minutes early and he was unexpectedly 5 minutes late.
But Wait!

I'd been having my suspicions! I should (for completeness) post ZS and M's email volleys here -- I emailed both of them (yes, I live with M, but for some reason we email each-other) -- they echoed each-other with "you have nothing to lose." M, said: "the only thing we have to lose is the cost of the coffee" (she still thought we were meeting at Naked Lounge -- what happened to that anyway?) FYI my coffee cost ninety-nine cents. I 'tipped' the nice lady behind the counter a penny. I'll make it up to her by bringing Trader Joe's to Chico. ;)

ohkay, so the meeting…
I knew it was him when he was still in the parking lot. I saw a blue buick take a VERY good parking space in front of the doughnut shop. Something suggested the driver didn't know the area very well and that must have been how I knew. Pluswhich: we were expecting him, so go figure.

He had a three-ring binder with him and was wearing a polo shirt. M had a doughnut (custard filled) and a bottle of apple juice. I had that ninety-nine cent coffee and a raspberry filled doughnut. Dominick went for some kind of pastry and I didn't really study it. Somehow I got sticky doughnut stuff on my hands but later spilled coffee on them and that helped me rince the sticky stuff off.

We chit-chatted about nothing and whatever for the first half hour. We were there for 2 and a half hours total. From 10 until after twelve-thirty. He talked about this 'buisness opportunity' and showed me a page from his binder showing a chart (all the pages were purportedly from a powerpoint presentation and I saw that the date stamped was January 2005; I only ever saw that one page) with all the costs a typical retail outlet has listed -- actually stacked -- on one side and a shorter list (no stack) on the other side. The stuff inbetween manufacturing and consumer was marked 'middlemen' or something of the sort. So direct marketing cuts out the middle man. ohkay, gotcha, I understand; continue.

He drew circles which I didn't think looked like a pyramid, really. I should have, but I didn't. He drew a circle (himself) and a line to another circle (me) and my circle had three lines going to three circles, one of them, my beloved M (you see, she is my first customer! woohoo for me). Do I have two other friends like M, and if so, are they in the 530 area code? ZS doesn't live here anymore, so I don't know how sure I am about my circles. The Monday-night people *sighs* don't seem to have enough money to be my customers. Anyway it looks like I'm supposed to be selling the business to these circles. But I didn't really see that yet, I was to have a website with "millions of products" you know, 'high quality' … right? and these circles would shop my site. but wait, they'd have their own sites. hm. I asked, but he avoided the question (or lied, I don't remember) about if the people who shoped from the people whose circles were connected to mine would earn me any money, I was left thinking the answer was negative. But he didn't really say.

Later, as we walked to his car, he had already told us he'd loan us a cassette tape (we like tapes, no reason) and so at his car he handed me a tape, and eventually handed me a black canvas folder/envelope (EnterNET service provider, very posh, I want to steal it, but M frowns on that idea) with 3 more tapes; I put the first tape into the bag. Before we left his presence, he told us we'd meet at our place (qua?) on Monday at 2PM (that's this afternoon, if anyone's keeping track)… and he wanted us to bring "at least one" friend who'd be interested. I wasn't supposed to say too much, but I was supposed to say this guy had a good business idea he wanted to share. and, oh yeah, we were supposed to have the living room cleaned up enough so he could give a presentation on the wall or something. Easy enough, we never really unpacked. One white sheet or two and it'd look like a room in an old mansion (with carpeting, so not so old mansion). The thing about bringing a friend nagged on me but I wasn't focused on it. Believe it or not, I had no opinion at this point.

IT'S TRUE! I really wanted to hear what M had to say. I'm notorously a REALLY BAD judge of character when I'm involved. (See the story I tried to tell Dominick about Steven -- costa mesa -- above, if you don't agree!) *sighs*

I told you I was talking to my friend on the phone (see above). Before Dominick loaned me the black canvas envelope, there was a folded piece of paper that was the only thing that he was going to leave me with. I neglected everything in the bag and looked only at that paper, I swear.

I saw the only thing I needed to see.

But first two emails that came from him while all this was going on. This was Friday afternoon and evening. Before reading these emails, I was having an emotional breakdown, so I can't vouch for anything else in the Universe, except, maybe, that it continued to exist.
-=-

2005-08-20T01:31:00.000-07:00

( ( ( He sent two emails. I'll separate them with some symbol or another, probably a bunch of dashes. ) ) )

1—

This message is not flagged. [ Flag Message - Mark as Unread ]
From: "Dominick Chiricosta" Add to Address BookAdd to Address Book
To: R.Wesley@Edwards.Net
Subject: Re: Our meeting this morning
Date: Thu, 18 Aug 2005 15:32:00 -0700

Hi Robert and Mayumi,

I enjoyed meeting the two of you and getting to know you a little, while at
the same time introducing you to my very unique web-based business.

It appears to me that you are on the wordy side, so am I. Here are some
points for you to read and re-read. I can't stress enough how important the
following points are for you, if you want to learn and build your own
business in affiliation with me (D&R Associates International) and Dennis
Delisle (DNA International):

1. You need to have a reason, a purpose, a "why" - make a list of the
things you want to have or to do that will motivate you to invest the time
to work with me to learn the business and to build your own business that
will produce the results you need.

2. Forget about what you know (or you think you know) when it comes to
building and running a business; our business model is very unique and you
just have to invest the time to learn it from me, my support organization,
and our online business office. Always get your information, about this
business, from those who have the facts and have "fruit on their trees". We
do not advertise nor do we teach this at any schools - we have a mentoring
system and an affordable Business Support System that you can learn from, if
you choose to.

3. Until you know enough about the business, don't try to explain it to
people you know or those that you'll meet. Just be excited about what you
know about the business and find a way to get them in front of me so that I
can explain it to them - they will be introduced to it and you will learn
more as we go!

4. Look for people that want more out of life than they are currently
able to have, and are willing to work for it >> then you can offer them this
business as the solution to their problem or need.

5. You may not understand some of the things I say about how our
business works; you need to develop an attitude to accept them on faith
until you understand them yourself as a result of the knowledge that you
will gain from the information you will hear from our Business Support Team
and me.

6. When you invite individuals or couples to your apartment to listen
to me presenting an overview of the business, be sure to always have your
place clean and dress as if you're going to an interview - shirt and tie
preferably. They will get a positive impression of you and of the business
opportunity that they came to learn about.

Well that's all for now....Call me if you have any questions.

Looking forward to helping you build your business, if you choose to!

Dominick

( ( ( Hm. I have to comment that at the doughnut shop he didn't make such demands about how I dress and how I make the livingroom look. Also, notice he says 'if you choose to!' I know what I said, sorry. ) ) )

----- ----- ----- -----

( ( ( …on to the next email, shall we?… ) ) )

2—

This message is not flagged. [ Flag Message - Mark as Unread ]
From: "Dominick Chiricosta" Add to Address BookAdd to Address Book
To: R.Wesley@Edwards.Net
Subject: Re: Our meeting this morning
Date: Thu, 18 Aug 2005 19:26:14 -0700

One more item....if you have time, login to www.dnaintl.com with access
code: 923435x --- "Your Community" - a part of my online office to help
people learn and build their business anywhere in the world (soon)!

Call me or send me e-mail tomorrow so that we can set up time and give
address for Saturday.

Dominick

*shakes head sadly*

2005-08-19T17:41:00.000-07:00

(I told blogger I typed this exactly 12 hours ago, at 17:41 PST)

What I saw on that one folded sheet of paper that Dominick put in the black canvas envelope (I may figure out a way to steal it: I think I deserve a souvenir) was the word:

Quixtar.com
-r
Finally, the gumball dropped. That sinking feeling I'd been feeling had finally burst forth from the swamp with all of it's fart-smell glory.

quixtar is amway
amway is a legal pyramid scheme (barely)
amway/quixtar is like a cult of greed based on fear and wishful thinking and wrapped around a bizarre wishfulfilment philosophy: "if you can dream it, it will come, someone else will build it"

Look at how he talked in that one email: "figure out your 'why'" why? Fuck you!
Ohkay.

So I had the opportunity to sharpen my anger and I started by emailing my librarian friend in my old hometown, Gibson City, Illinois: Sharon Craig.
Read my eamil and her response below:
-=-

2005-08-19T17:38:00.000-07:00

Date: Fri, 19 Aug 2005 12:06:52 -0700 (PDT)
From: "The Computer Guy" Add to Address BookAdd to Address Book
Yahoo! DomainKeys has confirmed that this message was sent by yahoo.com. Learn more
Subject: RE: 60936 to 82901 to 90605
To: "scraig"

( ( ( She emailed me information about a programming job in a town called Bloomington which is nearby to my hometown, though that town is somewhat larger. That's what I'm thanking her for… ) ) )

Thankyou, you are so helpful.
-r
PS:
Something that happened to me...

I have my resume posted on a popular website (here in Ca, it's popular, that is) called Craig's list (craigslist.com). The title is "database programmer".

Anyway, I got an email a few days ago from a nice-sounding man named Dominick. He'd seen my resume and said something about a business opportunity.
Considering all I do is fix computers, install networks and write programs (some using a database), I assumed that he was talking about a job.

There were a couple of red flags, but I'm a complete moron, so I let it pass. But it wasn't like I didn't have skepticism, I emailed a friend that I was afraid it may be a scam. One of the red flags was that in the email he sent me he said the business was "legal,
ethical and moral" ... WHY WOULD ANYONE SAY THAT? Isn't it to be /assumed/?

Anyway so he asked me to give him a couple time slots on either Thursday or Friday to meet and somewhere here in Chico (he lives in Lake Oroville -- I don't know where that is -- could use google maps, I guess).
I took M (girlfriend) with me. The arrangement was for the doughnut shop across the street.

We got a doughnut each and she got apple juice and I got a $.99 coffee and we sat down to wait for Dominick. I knew him when I saw his car, a blue buick.

He came in, we shook hands, I introduced myself and M.
We chitchatted about nothing for thirty minutes.

For the next 2 hours, we talked about his 'opportunity'. Eventually, I learned it was quixtar
-- quixtar.com -- ie Amyway -- aka MLM. I must be the biggest fool on the planet.

Maybe it suggests I'm particularly connected or something, because this is like the third time I've encountered these people. Once I went to a 'group interview' set up by one of these fraudsters. I'm right now filling out the FTC complaint form. (
https://rn.ftc.gov/pls/dod/wsolcq$.startup?Z_ORG_CODE=PU01
).

I did a little digging and the skeptics dictionary has them listed between 'amulet' and 'ancient astronauts'!
*sighs*
foiled again.

The really annoying thing is that I'd really looked forward to helping someone with their computer problems and making some money. I think I covered the stages of grief and now I'm just mad. Talk to you later.
-=-

2005-08-19T17:37:00.000-07:00

Date: Fri, 19 Aug 2005 17:03:03 -0500
From: "scraig" View Contact Details View Contact Details
To: R.Wesley@Edwards.Net
Subject: RE: 60936 to 82901 to 90605

Here's the e-mail address:
david.camping.breeze@somefarm.com

I got into Amway also when I was younger, don't be too hard
on yourself--you had to check it out. Sharon

Blame Canada!

2005-08-19T17:36:00.000-07:00

Canadians can be funny, here is a conversation vis-a-vis quixtar/Amway among some Vancouver people…

Finally…
I'll post the email I wrote to him. You should know that I CC'd it to my 'list' which is 'everyone I know' (not really, it's just the people I email at least once a month and some of those people don't really ever email me back, but it looked cool to see it CC'd to a bunch of names, like I'd planned it from the beginning, like an amateur sting operation. Not quite.

But I feel good about it.

I really did think he was a nice guy, right up until I read the word 'quixtar.com' on that page.

*sighs* Oh well.
-r
PS:
Later… Monday, M starts her Fall Semester here at CSU, Chico. I'll also post the MLM thing I wrote that I plan on reading on Monday. You people have more of the story, so I hope this effort was worth it.

I'd like to point ya'all to the skeptic's dictionary and to a quixtar blog which are both excellent sources of anti-mlm/amway/quixtar/team/tod etc. Lastly!!!! Even though we're probably privately enemies, this guy has a good deal of information about MLMs and etc. I'd also like to mention that I should write a letter to the editor of the CSU, Chico student paper, the Orion, warning students about MLM/get rich (quick) scams.

I'll also open this last email to comments, as I don't plan on publishing a 'capper.' I want it to be the final word before we comment. Blogger willing, that is.

Rodent wanted: Small and Blind

2005-08-19T16:59:00.000-07:00

Subject: why i will not help you dupe my friends

This message is not flagged. [ Flag Message - Mark as Unread ]

Date:	Sat, 20 Aug 2005 01:41:15 -0700 (PDT)
From:	"The Computer Guy" Add to Address Book
Subject:	why i will not help you dupe my friends
To:	"Dominick Chiricosta"
CC:	"Exé Angelus Est", "Jeff Benton", "Big Eddie", "JoEl", "Lincoln Mayer" , "Robbie J. Mendez" , "Michael Miller", "The ZombieSlayer", "M", "mom"

I haven't been Chico very long.  About as many months
as there is in the calendar so far this year.  I know
maybe a half a dozen people.  The folded piece of
paper that you would have given me to go home with
contained the one word that had you said it from the
start would have invalidated everything else you had
to say and saved you some time and me some emotional
bumps in the road.
quixtar.
quixtar is amway.
amway is a legal pyramid scheme.
people don't sell products, people sell amway --
quixtar.
ibos -- IBOs -- independent business owners can
expect, considering they're cutting out the middle man
to become middle men themselves, to collect, on
average, less than $700/year.  So if I have a business
that I spend 500 hours on and only make 700 dollars, I
should seriously find new work and fast, before I
bleed out.

The other thing is that amway/quixtar is like a cult.
Even the way you spoke was like a cult.  The 'change
the way you think' and 'you are around the wrong kinds
of people' is VERY cult-like.

I honestly thought you were a nice guy.  Now I am
trying to reconcile that with this 'business
opportunity' and I can come to only one conclusion:
either
you are a moron
or
you are a moron and you think I am too.
...
You lost so much credibility because you gained it by
being knowledgable about the industry.  'the industry'
of computers.  Now I am trying to figure out if a
person could fake it -- I don't keep up with certain
things, only the specific things inwhich I specialize.
I tend, also, to believe things told to me that don't
directly conflict with the things I already know.

But I will not be your shill while you set up my
friends to join your cynical cult of greed.
Even though people may think I've become cynical, your
view is more cynical still.  You're reduced to the
stature of an ant.  Leaving a scent trail for other
ants to follow you to the food.  Only in your case,
there is no food.  But you hope that other ants will
follow you anyway.  In our world, you'd end up far
from society and you'd eat them.
which is how it works.  The more people I help you
"present this business opportunity" the more people
you'll make money off of.  And it is only WORSE if I'm
making money in the deal too.

I'd become the Jehovah's Witness of my peer group.  No
one would trust me.  I'd be 24/7 ... and I'd be
losing.  And if I knew I was losing, you and your
group would call me a loser.  I just couldn't cut it.
I wasn't working hard enough.  it's bullshit.

I can get that crap from where I am standing now.  But
the truth?

I know the truth.  I have worked very hard to be the
best programer there is.  I have learned to deal with
machine intelligence so that databases contain
information the way baskets contain apples.  I can
reach out and I can take them and put them into a bag
and maybe eat them later.

I am a wordsmith.  If you had been paying attention,
you'd see that I use metaphors and I understand the
complexity of this language better than a good
percentage of the people around.  I am a poet.

You ignored me when I tried to show you what I can do.
You ignored me when I spoke about myself.  Somehow
you zero'd in on the stuff that would make me a better
target for your pitch.

You seem to have known I'd see through it, because you
were embarrassed to show me your power-point
presentation from January 05.  I only saw that one
page.  I have a feeling that had I seen more pages, I
would have made the connection and you would not even
have seen me throw away my coffeecup, let alone seen
me leave.

Yesterday I was profoundly sad.  I said: "this is what
it's come to: I'm not even respected for being a human
being, let alone *sighs* an intellectual who can make
the language and the computers work for me."

So fuck you.  I honestly thought you were taking me
seriously.  I had to file a complaint with the FTC
about you and your MLM.  I found Amway/Quixtar in the
skeptic's dictionary between 'amulet' and 'ancient
astronauts.'

You know how I feel today: I'm angry as hell.  I'm
angry that people can be like this.  I'm angry that
you think I'm so stupid.  I'm pissed that people whose
lives are a little off-track can be taken in by your
nazi-like, terrorist-in-training-camp-like speal.

Why are you so cynical?  I hope you work your ass off
trying to get people to sign on for your
zombie-fication and only make a couple grand a year.
If you're a successful Amway 'distributor' that's what
you'll make.

Normally people say: "have a nice day," I want you to
have a shitty day.  I want you to have a shitty rest
of your life.  I want your kids to resent you and
think you are insane.  I want the government to decide
you aren't fit to make your own decisions and give
that little task to a small blind rodent.
-r
PS:
If you want your recruitment materials, I think the
nice lady behind the counter at the doughnut shop may
hold it for you until the end of the day.
-=-

--- Dominick Chiricosta <dnrchiricosta@sbcglobal.net>
wrote:

> Hello Robert,
>
>
>
> My name is Dominick Chiricosta.  Once a victim of
> corporate downsizing, but no more!
>
>
>
> A friend of mine recommended that I look at
> craiglist.com to find people who might be in a
> similar situation or just looking for a change and
> want to move on: 1) looking to generate some extra
> income, or 2) interested in an opportunity to
> significantly improve their current situation.
>
>
>
> What you had to say in your note/resume, captured my
> interest!  Can't promise you anything, but possibly
> I can help.
>
>
>
> After 30+ years in Corporate America (Computer
> Systems / IT Services Management / Management
> Consulting), getting downsized several times, and
> spending a lot of time and energy looking for
> another JOB (just over broke); I finally took
> command of my financial future.  I have teamed up
> with some business people and close friends of mine
> from the Bay Area and am establishing a web-based,
> Interactive Commerce T business.  We have applied
> our combined skills and experiences to create a
> unique business model and, we solved the problem
> with "stickiness" for the typical "dot com"
> business!
>
>
>
> Our business is legal, ethical, and moral. It is
> anchored on free enterprise principles, a win-win
> philosophy, and conservative principles and values.
> We plan to expand the business internationally and
> are looking for a few motivated people (P/T or F/T)
> who want more out of life than "just survive".
> Individuals or couples who are team players, not
> afraid of change, willing to learn, flexible, have a
> desire to win, want to make a difference, and will
> make the effort to do the necessary work to achieve
> their goals.
>
>
>
> If you consider yourself to be this type of person
> or would like more information, contact me so that
> we can set up a detailed discussion of my needs,
> your interest and goals, and determine if there is a
> mutual interest for us to work together.
>
>
>
> dnrchiricosta@sbcglobal.net
>
>
>
> "Whether we spend life winning or loosing depends on
> how we use our mind-sight - what we choose to 'see'
> or to 'dream'".  Dr. David J. Schwartz
>
>
>

---------------------------------
* Human Language Research *
*  ~e                     * A not-for-profit organization
*  http://www.uhlc.org   *
UHLC: Everybody's Talking
---------------------------------

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big crayons | small walls

2005-08-09T00:30:00.000-07:00

Monday, August 08, 2005

Mic-less Open Mic

Here is what I read tonight at Has Beans Cafe:
~
-r
-----
I am writing with big crayons
on small walls.

You have to choose your side—
The Wolf or the Three Little Pigs;
Goldilocks or the Three Bears

The way I see it, that selfish
bitch came into someone's house
when they were gone —
Made herself at home…
and—
was discovered (ah!)

Freakin' prowler. I suggest the bears
adopt a policy of eating
…uninvited guests.

Three Little Pigs. They worked hard to build their houses. Moving… unpacking — such a bitch.

What right does the wolf have?
Comin' and ruinin' houses to
what now?
eat the inhabitants?

I want to suggest an updated theme for these two fables —
Minority gaining at the expense of the majority.

We can't say the wolf didn't first try to bargain—

But what kind of deal is that:
come out so I can kill you…?
else…?
I'll destroy your house…AND…
kill you?!
…and eat you.

Sounds like re-distribution of wealth … and labor.

Give me what I want but don't deserve. Give in to my threats or I'll make good on them.

Either way: You lose — you're mine. — I win!

Goldilocks, I don't give a damn if you are lost in the forest.
I don't care if the bears ATE your fuckin' parents—
There are proper channels!
There is protocol!

Just BARGE right in when the Bears' aren't there.

Make yourself at home.

Freakin' spoiled Republican brat.

Ya gotta admire her brazen-ness, though
— it takes guts to fall asleep in
a house where you've looted and
vandalized.

I'm a bear, I come home — broken chairs, missing food…
Weird blonde girl sleeping soundly in Junior's bed.

What?!!!

We only barely went for a walk so the porridge could cool.
Damn: the vermin waste no time in these parts.

We should let Junior eat 'er.

Damn interloper.

Lucky for her, she's quick.
Or she'd be dinner.

Ya see?!!!

One story is the tale of the majority being royally shafted and the other…

Unlawful entry — I mean — at Least.

Please sign the petition to bring that juvenile-delinquent, Goldilocks, house breaker, to justice.

I mean — she was caught red handed!

Actually she probably needs therapy—
at least!

Maybe mental-defective. I mean: who the hell makes a broad daylight B and E at a house where
Three Bears live?

She must have a death wish.
Psychotic!
Suicidal.

Suicide by bear.

I always did wonder about that girl —
for God's sakes: Who would name a normal girl for the color of
her hair?

Meanwhile, on the other side of town,
ya got that asshole-bully of a wolf terrorizing that innocent family of
pigs.

That is one hungry and — need I say it — self-centered — wolf!

I propose a referendum:
We can call it—
Resolution to let pigs keep their houses.

First step: a court sanctioned restraining order: the wolf can get no closer than 500 yards of the pigs.

That is — if he hasn't already eaten them by the time we get the papers signed.

Prolly waste time arguing it out with Mr. Wolf's lawyers.

Those are some shrewd lawyers, too.

^* Weirdly, though, these lawyers are most likely NOT Jewish. —not practicing, anyway

(Of course, Mr. Wolf isn't exactly contractually obligated to share his pork with his lawyers… but— nevermind)

Ahead of us, though: the bears are in court suing that blonde girl.
She claims to remember nothing.
Then she says they invited her in.
and, just now, I heard she accused
THEM of kidnapping her and
Oh — Thank God she's safe now!

But the bears have an airtight case:
They don't kidnap little blonde
girls—they eat them—

in broad daylight
in public, if need be
at campsites…
—in the street, even.

Nobody buys the kidnapping story.
She's pleading insanity
how long did that take? — _{[*looking at watch*]}

Should plead stupidity.

Maybe she's one of George Bush's daughters.
Should give 'er a drug test, too.

They should've ate her—
Put up with her family's
wrongful death lawsuit
with their "finders' eaters" defense.

That one works every time:

Just ask Mr. Wolf

(or you can sign my petition to give pigs the right to vote… bears, too.)

In our world, it wouldn't matter, somehow I'm supposed to believe the pigs elected the wolf sheriff.

In our world, I'm expected to accept Goldilocks's right to sleep at the Bears' house.

Move on, Bears, Humans live here now—
up the hill with you. Go up to land we haven't decided we want …yet…

What do ya expect? Leavin' yer porridge unattended and yer house open…

People no longer fear the Bears.

In our world, She'd sue THEM because Papa Bears's bed was too firm.

Better— because the porridge burned her.

This is the world we live in:

The Wolf is sheriff—
and Goldilocks, amateur house-breaker is suing the Zoo because they "allowed" her to climb over the wall into the Grisley habitat!

She'll win, too.
Animal rights activists will chime in, too—it was all traumatic for the Bears…

(My head's gonna explode!)
-----

^* I skipped this part; I didn't read it to the crowd at Has Beans…

-=-

2005-08-08T01:03:00.000-07:00

Senseless and/or outdated laws

…

http://stupit2.blogspot.com/2005/08/old-peoplenot-nice-kind-but-irrational.html
-r
PS:
Many responces to your comments.
I should have a whole RANT about senseless and/or outdated laws. (one of the things I FREAKED out about in the comments thingy) ... BETTER YET, since you do it so much better: Can I ask YOU to write an article about all the outdated and/or senseless laws? You can title it:
Savage says I should write about outdated and/or senseless laws.
…
You can even do google searches to come up with a few turkeys for entertainment value, like how supposedly in some states it is 'still' illegal to 'swear' in front of a lady. I know, I know, there's a whole book about this stuff (I've seen it) ... that one is from such a book, I think. The book, I remember, covers both senseless AND outdated laws, like stuff regarding horse manure in main street and not entering a saloon or public house with your gun unholstered. haha!
Maybe that was a senseless law way back when, now it is just outdated.
-=-

…

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop?

2005-08-07T03:59:00.000-07:00

I'm responding to Zombieslayer's article about third parties.

I started writing it IN his comments section…
If you've read his article and if you've read my comment, you can skip down to where there are SIX ASTERISKS, that is, the next time you see ****** …

The classism issue has gotten worse; we need to have 8 or 10 parties. Having only 2 is like the weekly newsmagazines. They're both so afraid of scaring off advertisers and offending subscribers that they are worth less than toilet paper.
If one of them actually does take a stand on something it is a big damn issue and then they back off (re: newsweek and the riots it supposedly kicked off) ... even if they're right in the first place!
But I digress.
-r
PS:
Actually we have the technology to have a real democracy, instead of a republic that we call a democracy. But it may be that we are MUCH BETTER off with said republic because of the dreaded tyranny of the majority (group psychology, people are sheep jus' lookin' fer a shepard, etc.) ... Besides getting everyone syncronized to vote on policy whenever something comes up may be "unmercibly" slow.

Actually it would be good to have a REFERENDUM that simply breaks up the two major parties and ESTABLISHES a more scattershot system (per ZS's suggestion).

Pluswhich: (like sandwich?) NOT EVERY ISSUE should be taken up with the President, Congress or Supreme [or any other] court. Most of the time Government shouldn't be involved AT ALL. For instance: look at the IRS and the FCC. On one hand we have a government organization with ridiculous powers and scares people (while you're thinking about that, think about what goes through your mind when you're driving and you see a cop) and the other is basicly (I know, I know, BASICALLY) synonomous with 'censorship in America' do you know what Radio stations are fined if someone -- even a guest -- says the "f-word" ? alot.

Other things clearly need government intervention. Like, say, Mexico declaring war on us. (It could happen.) ...or Canada.

******

Think about Art and Music (that's right, capital letters) in public schools. Would the government have to fund the 'arts' (National Endowment for the Arts) if schools were properly funded? We have P.E. ... but mostly NO MUSIC! And art classes are so sad. I mean, really.
(I don't know what that was, maybe: brainfart.)

We have 'life, liberty and the persuit of happiness' … I heard that Canadians have … what is it again … here it is, "Peace, order and good government" …
There is such a telling difference.
-=-

Later, I will eat your dog.

2005-08-02T03:20:00.000-07:00

Old People

Not the nice kind, but the irrational kind who haven't noticed that the world has changed, and/or that it was never the sparkling gemstone they always thought it was.
O.K.
So what would thrill me would be for people to give me ANY FEEDBACK.
The theme is cranky old people.
-r
PS:

At zombie-slayer's blog, I mentioned an old woman who nearly ran us over and then acted like it was our fault -- all she had to do was not take her foot off the break.

*sighs*
-=-

Cages of grief

2005-07-24T05:27:00.000-07:00

Elsabeth Kubler-Ross
5 Stages of Grief

How many times to I have to come in here and beat you before you shut the fuck up!!?! (I feel better now.)

Ohkay, so I asked and there were no takers. I guess I over-estimated the number of people who actually read this thing. I need to get more interesting and while I'm at it, I probably should post more articles and return people's favors by reading and commenting on other people's articles.

Maybe I'll resolve to do that in the future.

Next month, I will be able to do the above, probably. I'll be sitting around waiting for the end of the world. I will be at CSU sumpthin' waitin' for Mrs. Savage (ha!)'s class(es) to end. So I'll have a ton of time.

That's how it is with me. I either have a ton of time and no money, or a ton of money and no time. Then after I've worked like crazy and get my ton o'cash I have nothing but time and so I spend it all. Then I have no money and 'round and 'round it goes.

hm…

Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance

So first, supposedly, we say: eh? no, I don't believe it.
Then we say: I'm really freakin' pist about that!
Later, we're all: If I had turned right, then maybe…
After that, we get all sad.
Lastly, we learn to be a trifle o.k. with it all and then, I guess we move on to the next tradgedy.
BUT WAIT!
The folks here don't want you to wade too deeply into those waters.

It starts,

Few concepts have insinuated themselves into the popular culture as thoroughly as the so called "5 Stages of Grief"

… and then goes on to tell us they are flawed.

How?
Must I summarize EVERYTHING for ya?
Ohkay, I'll do it, but…

Originally meant as the 5 stages of dealing with horrible news… (but somehow mutated over time)
Too general. Grief is too complicated, personal and individualized to be summed up in "5 easy steps."
Suggestive. a) suggests that the order must be followed strictly. b) if you don't go through these stages you are in need of professional psychological help.

These guys go on to define grief through a brief recent history of psychologists.
But whoa, that was a bit much. I really just wanted people to tell me what the name of their first pet (or first they can remember) especially cat, dog or horse, something big that is expected to live awhile. Name of first pet and what happened to him or her. The more details, the better.

I'll start. But I warn you, mine's lame. I had a hamster named cotton or snowball (depending on who you ask) she had a litter of 14 (FORTEEN!!!!) babies. Some of them ate others and some, we suspected were eaten by der mummy.

Anyway, one of the offspring was a grey male (my female was like a fluffy light tan and the neighbor's male was white with multi-colored splotches so this color was not expected). The grey male was my favorite. He had difficult to see dark brown racing stripes on his flanks.
Eventually I did something that pissed off my mother and she went to the basement to drown him but he bit her and so she dropped him and then stepped on him. My brother and I buried him in the vegetable garden.

Mom doesn't remember this and it is probably better for peace between us if it stays this way, especially since I brought it up at the custody hearing where my father won custody. That f'n mind f*ckin' bastard.

If you'd rather I tell you about a dog:

Had a dog, his name was Barney. He was medium-sized. One of his eyes was blue and one was brown. He was part husky and part wolfhound. I even took him with me when Mom "kidnapped" me to Colorado. Later, after being re-united with my father, he decided I was a shitty owner and we took him out to the edge of town with a bowl of dog food and left him there.

For the record, Mrs. Savage (ha!) thinks that was really f'd up of my father.
Yer turn…

Send in the Wolfe

2005-07-19T15:00:00.000-07:00

Gene Wolfe

…
[Was writing this recommendation in an email to the ZombieSlayer and at the end, decided it sounded like one of these articles, so I told him I'd copy it here, so here…]
-r

PS:
Have you ever heard of Gene Wolfe? It's just that you like Harry Potter and you [ZS] said [in a blog] that you like a good story -- also 'make me laugh and you have a friend for life' even if you're exagerating, I think you'd like Gene Wolfe's books. It helps that they are usually long and he likes to do series(es?)…

I recommend them all, but especially:
The Book of the New Sun

(comprising--
Shadow and Claw
[comprising--

The Shadow of the Torturer {and}

The Claw of the Conciliator] [and]

Sword and Citadel
[comprising--

The Sword of the Lictor {and}

The Citadel of the Autarch])

The Urth of the New Sun (sequel)
The Wizard Knight series, comprising--

The Knight

(and)

The Wizard

The two called Book of the Long Sun and Book of the Short Sun are related (clearly) to the Book of the New Sun, but you'd have to have read it first; and you probably wouldn't like these Long/Short if you didn't like it. New Sun is the most ... I have no words, I'll copy a review I found at Yahoo:
***** (five stars out of five) A simple review from a "seasoned reader"., May 2, 2005
Reviewer: Craig Lam "Lebensraum Kulturkampf" (Aberdeen, Scotland)--

If you like easygoing, unimaginative, fluffy rubbish you will not like this book.
If you lack the intelligence to meet the author halfway and understand all the clues he leaves you dotted throughout Severian's narrative, you will not "get" this book.
If you're one of those despicable cads who thinks everything should have the sort of meaning that is easily evident and measured using high school literary analysis acumen, you won't like this book.
If you like being spoonfed mush by ludicrously awful writers like Jordan, Mccaffrey, Goodkind, Brooks et al and think that such gruel is high literature, this book will fly over your head.

If you like using your brain when reading, you'll probably like this.
If you can appreciate a combination of subtlety and a sense of the grandiose, you'll probably like this.

As for the "problem" with the big and obscure words: if you can't infer the meaning of the problematic or exotic word via the context - what are you doing spending your money on literature anyway? Jesus Hulkmaniac Christ. Go buy some American Gladiators or Dragon Ball Z DVDs. You know, something more suited to your infantile intellects.
---

I don't necessarily share his view of McCaffrey, etc. But he makes his point well.

I hope all my efforts with the images and links aren't wasted. :)

[PPS:
(I said,) I'll copy this to stupit2, seems like a blog, n'est ce-pas?]
-=-

2005-07-16T16:29:00.000-07:00

Theft and fraud issues

There are so many theft and fraud issues that have come to my attention (by way of Mrs. Savage (ha!)) in the past couple of years.

One of the biggest (I thought) was Farmers Insurance lack of loyalty to their customers. I'll have to remember to write an entire rant -- or, as you'll see below, dedicate an entire blog to their obnoxious little scheme -- about it.

The one that concerns me most today, however, is the practices of a Language School associated with the CSU system and based at the Long Beach campus.

I initiated an entire blog: "ali-fraud.blogspot.com" here.

I'll sumarize:
school introduces international student of English language to 'homestay' family on the pretense that the student will be able to practice English at home, among other perks (food, access to kitchen, cheaper to rent a room than an apartment, no roommate sharing said room, whatever) ...

Homestay 'mom' gives student grammer book. Homestay family lies and attempts to defraud student. Later, family lies (more) to discredit student (says they loaned grammer book to student and she never returned it) and the school calls student in to explain behavior, but they call her a liar and a thief so by 'explain,' I guess I mean: "apologize for."
-r
PS:
I suggest you read and comment there if you want to address this specific issue, but comments addressing fraud, especially examples and links are very welcome.
Thanks for reading.
-=-

2005-07-15T13:00:00.000-07:00

Pissy Little Rant (about Movie Reviewers)
Actually I'm going to try really hard to not make a negative venom-filled post. Here goes...
Hm.
...
Still thinking...
...
Ohkay, maybe I'm just a terminally negative person, or maybe, excepting stories and (sometimes) poetry, I don't see the point of writing about it if it's positive. What am I going to say: "I like that, keep it" ?
There is an exception -- I absolutely hate it when people review movies or performances and they're all negative and vicious. What's the point? Why did you waste your time and now mine with this junk. The best thing you can do when something is so bad is to ignore it and hope it goes away. Elsewise, just mentioning it keeps it in print. Even if people are hating your whatever, they're at least still paying attention. There's a saying and I'm going to hate myself for forgetting who said it, but it goes something like this: "Say what you want about me, just spell my name right."

Ohkay, so movies. If you write a neutral-sounding review and then finish off with a grade like Entertainment Weekly a la "D-," I'm not talking about that. But, for instance, Ebert reviewing THGTTG, he basicly said he didn't like it because he didn't know all the culture and back-story. Sorta like: "I don't get it. It sucks."

But the broader picture is sometimes I read a movie review and the person hates it and they give stuff away and then when I see it, I totally disagree with them and then it's like: I wish I hadn't read that review.
In fact, it's always, 'I wish I had not read that review.' It goes back to my expression "the more I know, the less I like."
It's good for things like the environment, but for entertainment, it is just sad. On one hand, Jane Goodal and her chimps are like a big lie. She and her mom had been making sandwiches for Belgum refugees all morning and she was shooting in the evening. And geez, people, I hate to spoil your little fantasy, but it wasn't like she was ALONE there with the chimps. A) someone had to pay (Gulf Oil) B) What did you think, she had some kind of automation on the cameras. C) There are governments, everywhere -- Africa, again, don't mean to spoil your little fantasies, is no exception.
[ps- Mrs. Savage just showed me evidence that I keep spelling "basic-ly" wrongly. It is b-a-s-i-c-a-l-l-y. But I always spell it wrongly and I don't pronounce it Basic-all-ee. Basic Ali.]

Where was I?
Oh yeah. Fuckin' movie reviewers.
It seems like there is enough negativity going around. It seems like the best a person (reviewer) can do is write like a disclaimer: "I did not like this movie. I expected to, because I like the main actor/actress or director, but I was sadly mistaken. You may like this movie, if you liked [list of other similar movies here]." or "I hated this movie. It was like the movie company and theatre conspired to steal directly from me, money and time. I have filed a formal petition of complaint and expect to hear back very soon. All through this film all I remember thinking, besides the stuff above, was how unusually clean the theatre's floor was. I have to compliment AMC in Downey, near Garfield and Firestone, California for their clean floors. It was a treat to see this shitty flick in your theatre. You'll be hearing from my lawyers. Also named in the suit are my editor and the publisher of this newspaper [or magazine] for making it my assignment to see this gawd-awful flick."
What I'm saying, of course, is 'if you hate the movie, at least make the review entertaining.'

Personally, I think that the situation would be better if the person didn't write the review at all. Then bad movies would just die. Or the people writing about them would actually have something intelligent or nice to say.
aha!

1) Nice.
2) Intelligent.
3) Entertaining.
If you're going to write a review of something, this blog included, at least have two of the above.

-r
PS:
thanks.
-=-

2005-07-11T19:47:00.000-07:00

Extracted from an extracted post transcribed from mind and paper.
thusly...
[copy and eh paste...]

Now, see if you can follow the logic.
Person A observes that though Person A does Person C favors on behalf of Person B, Person C isn't friendly toward Person B and because of the loyalty connection between Persons A and B, the apparent anamosity from Person C toward Person B makes Person A uncomfortable. So Person A doesn't want to do Person C any more favors. Meanwhile, Person B (that's me) is completely oblivious to Person C's behavior and will one day discuss the situation with Person D (yes, Zombieslayer) and may have to discuss it, because Person B (myself) has some kind of reckless "honesty thing" ... Anyway I may have to discuss it with Person C.
Meanwhile... Now Person B is AWARE (because Person A made these said observations while doing favors for Person C, and especially doing a big favor (driving Person C to Sacramento). And because I'm aware, I've been doing two obvious things that I'll talk about in spite of their painful self-evidentness:
1) Paying attention to how Person B (that's me) interacts with Person C (but I'm especially conscious of how Person C reacts to Person B).
2) Thinking up alternative theories to "I don't think he likes you."

For instance, it is possible that Person C is just like that. It is also possible that I can be off-putting and this tends to rub Person C the wrong way, whereas I (and some friends, and maybe Person A (clearly Mrs. Savage (ha!))) may think it is one of the things that makes me who I am and maybe even makes me interesting. Hey, I'm not Monica (girl I went to the Prom with) -- that is -- I don't need everyone to like me. I'm actually surprised when people are blase about me. I'm USED to people REACTING -- love me or hate me. Being all, "eh... I don't really care one way or the other" makes me question your intelligence or sanity. I'd rather be hated. And if I am, I'd rather be hated by someone intelligent. Nothing is worse than being loved by someone stupid. They start to be like a needy dog.

Oh, hated by someone stupid? You want a clever metaphor or that? Don't hold your breath. We've all experienced it; it's a cliche.

Mrs. Savage (ha!) took the TOEFL last Tuesday. I can't imagine a reaction less appropriate than the one she had. If she knew she passed, I'd expect her to be happy. If she feared (or knew) she failed, I'd expect her to be stressed out, frustrated, and trying to escape from 9592x (AGAIN!)... She was all: "eh? Oh, I dunno. I wrote about how people don't read to their kids anymore..." The Zombieslayer once told us that he is a terrible test taker (something unfortunate about the Saturday Afternoon Test) and Mrs. Savage (ha!) agreed; or did he agree with her? Anyway, I think I figured out why I'm not a bad test taker. Somehow, growing up, people started treating me like I was super smart. Now, unless the test is unfair, I usually go in with complete confidence.
I'm not necessarily smart, I think it's the confidence.

In college I knew a girl, and I wish I could this section clout by remembering her first name, not like Brenda on the phone with triple-A Southern California, anyway, she said she could get into anywhere, she could take tests and pass, she could interview, etc. But once she got in, once the light comes to her eyes through the open door, she freezes and things get hard. Sometimes I'm like that, but usually my confidence turns into arrogance and I'm ohkay on the job.

I have to go to the kitchen now to find Monday's blurb so I can transcribe it above. I'll have to remember to replace someone's name with "Person C."
{See the previous post ( ... below ... )}

[done ... really]

2005-07-11T19:42:00.000-07:00

[Zombieslayer suggested I cut the other one, so here is the snipet]
[...]
We like Costco. (This is supposed to be a whole topic itself.)

On July 4th, Mrs. Savage (ha!) and I "adopted" another cat. A poetry "buddy" (I'll talk about this later, too) told me that in spite of my evidence to the contrary, the new cat may have been someone else's cat, so to that guy, I say...
On July 4th, Mrs. Savage (ha!) and I "catnapped" another cat.

The following is what I wrote and read on Monday at SPOKEN-WORD-NOT-POETRY night at "Micless Open Mic" at Has Beans here in 9592x.
vis:

-----
My girlfriend and I went with "Person C" to Sacramento on Thursday (June 30, 2005). It was a seriously hot day and the a/c in the car scarcely helped -- least of all, "Person C," in the back seat, driver's side -- in the direct sunlight both going and returning. He had to go deal with the state government about something -- I still don't know how successful he was.

I know he tried -- unsuccessfully -- to buy my girlfriend drinks (like tea, soda, something cold for the drive). I know he paid for all the gas -- but still insisted on doing something for her (she drove).
I learned that at Costco in Sacramento, a person can get gas -- and by "person," I mean, "member."

By the time we got back, 1 PM, it was still pretty early, but felt late -- the travel and the heat ...
I know Heather (another Monday-night-spoken-word person) may have gone, but perhaps we left too early.

---
My girlfriend an' I took a short walk yesterday (Sunday, July 3rd -- 2005) and met a stray cat.
We took another walk today an' took a can of cat food with us.
When we got to where we saw him the day before, he wasn't there, my girlfriend seemed disappointed.
I said, "meow meow meow" and the cat appeared in the yard, also talking.
We hung out with him and tried to give him the (wet) cat food, but he ignored it. Another cat, well-fed, came out and we saw it yesterday, too, and it was going to eat the food we'd brought -- but I threw rocks and crabapples at it.

I dumped out a container someone else had let -- I don't know which -- if either -- cat it was for -- and filled it with some of our water. The stray did not drink the water. He was interested in the dry food I had spilled onto the ground.
Somehow we decided to adopt him -- even though we'd have to get him fixed, and other things and we tried to get him -- puppy-like -- to follow us home. In the end, I carried him, putting him down at intervals in the shade.
We discussed what to call him -- there were two basic arguments: Today's the Forth of July (a Monday this year, 2005) -- Independence Day and something reflecting how he looks, or acts.
I made a suggestion I've forgotten (maybe it was to call him 'meow'?) and Mrs. Savage (ha!) said "Rusty" -- later, discussing Independence Day, she suggested to call him Washington.
But that was later, after we got him home, after, even, we'd cleaned him up and groomed him.
Rusty Washington may be a four-month old Bengal (he is tabby colored -- GREEN CAT -- and has spots on his tummy with a fluffy tail).

When we got home, one of us had to go in and the other would hand Rusty over the patio fence so we could make sure he didn't bring any fleas or anything into the house.
Mrs. Savage (ha!) couldn't open the patio door -- the handle is broken or something -- -- update: I've flipped the door over, you can easily open it from the inside now -- -- So I was "elected" to be the man inside.
I think it took us over two hours to clean him up so we could bring him inside. There were tufts of fur and -- eventually -- hot pine-scented water everywhere.
Another concern -- the biggest, actually -- was how he'd get along with our other cats.
It is apparent from looking at him that he has been in a few fights. Also, the well-fed cat I threw crabapples at didn't like him (they avoided each-other, sometimes it'd hiss at him). He has a scar on is forehead and numerous scars and tattering on his ears -- nothing you'd notice unless you were looking, but still, probably enough that he may not trust other cats.
It was around 2 in the afternoon when the animals were put into position to interact and there have been no fights so far. He is at the moment, a loner and they aren't exactly encouraging him to play. (Update: He seems to have an upset stomach and this also seems to make his anus sensitive. Also, the little cat, Stripe (he has a stripe on his back), is still a very young kitten and is CONSTANTLY trying to play with the new comer. Rusty hisses at him and swipes at him, but as I've been able to show, there are bigger things to be afraid of than a 7 lb cat and Stripe, I think, doesn't take Rusty seriously AT ALL. I have to manually intervene to keep Stripe from accosting Rusty while he uses the litterbox!)
He stays by the door to the patio, sliding glass. Perhaps he misses being outside. Being free. Maybe for him this is an anti-independence day. Maybe not. Our inside-strictly cats always sit by that same sliding-glass door and they want to go outside even if we're just adjusting the vertical blinds.
As "Person C" knows, I've nailed some flat PVC liner to the bottom of the fence surrounding the patio -- to make it harder for our cats to escape. (Update: If purring can be taken as a sign of cat happiness, he is very happy to be among us.)
Nothing, of course, keeps them from going over. And there is still room for them to go under, in spots. (Update: I took Rusty outside on a provisionary basis and twice he squeezed his tiny body under the patio fence liner; I have to supervise his outside playtime in a somewhat extreme way until he gets too big to go under the liner. But the problem is, by then, he'll be big enough that he'll probably be able to jump the fence in a single bound.) The patio, I learned, is tilted away from the "dwelling" -- probably to divert water -- but it defeats my efforts to close the gap between the bottom of the fence and the ground.
Rusty is way too skinny. Skinnier than our sickly kitten (Stripe, I mentioned him) was when we got him.
---

Anyway -- that's Thursday and Independence Day -- Thank you.
-----
[another cut, see above]
[...]
{that's all}
[end]

Driving is a cancer

2005-07-07T04:17:00.000-07:00

It is often said that driving is a privilege, not a right. This offends me. First of all, if it isn't a right, then it becomes like a company controlling access to water. If driving isn't a right, then you could say that the people who live closer to the river are allowed to control access to the water in the river. Tax money pays for roads and everything that is DMV. Car registrations and other TAXES also pay for the things that go into making our driving experience.

My point is...
Driving isn't a right or a privilege: Thinking like that just gets you trapped. It isn't like we're small fucking children and have to be told that "oxygen is a right, extra cookies from the cookie jar are a privilege" ...

Driving is a responsibility. When you take the wheel, your take on a responsibility. The other people on the road, or near the road, whether they're driving or walking or being driven or just sitting on the curb drinking a capuccino, have to trust that you aren't going to suddenly decide to have a little fun at their expense, they have to believe that you are competent to drive a motor vehicle, that you aren't under the influence of some foreign substance or agent that will compromise your judgement.

Judgement: That is a clear indication that you are talking about a responsibility rather than a right or a privilege. And...

As long as I'm talking about it, there aren't a whole lot of "rights" on the ol' list, gar. "Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness" Note "pursuit of" is supposedly a right. And "liberty" is an empty abstraction, assuming that "life" and "happiness" aren't also empty abstractions, liberty, thusly, has no meaning.

I hear about animal rights and I'm annoyed and frustrated and it pisses me off. If humans don't have rights, what the fuck makes you think animals have rights? My fucking god. If a shark had to think about the rights of other animals, he'd fucking starve. If doing experiments on rats that involves crashing their little rat brains into a wall and then disecting them helps us treat (note I don't say "cure") tumors or Parkinson's or whatever, HELL: if it helps us to UNDERSTAND trauma, it's worth it. If you're against my experimenting on the rat, goat, turkey or chimp, why the fuck don't YOU VOLUNTEER!

So much for rights. AND NO ONE HAS THE RIGHT TO LIFE. Anytime Chance chooses, you can die. All the insurance in the world isn't going to help you if you slip and fall on something, HARD. Just do what you can to live another day, if you have that taken care of, do what you can to enjoy it. Somewhere in there, you may think it's fun to help someone else live another day or maybe you'd like, make-a-wish style, to make that day enjoyable for someone else, whatever floats your goat. Hell, if you want to use your spare time and resources to make sure an animal lives another day or enjoys it, KNOCK YOURSELF OUT. But if you have to interfere with my research, I hope they put you in a dark hole for awhile. Maybe God will arrange it so you can watch someone suffering with a disease I could have cured if you'd let me keep my Guinea Pigs.

Next, PRIVILEGE. FUCK YOU. That's what I have to say to that. Some people have PRIVILEGES and other fucking people wake up in the morning, have coffee, because it's cheap, hurry to work, work. Get off, maybe they have some food, maybe someone shared with them, maybe. Anyway, after work, they have to go to another job, this one is tedious and sucks, because they're babysitting the security of some fuckin' PRIVILEGED person or stuff (think of a bank's security guard).

So there's Johnny "I want more cake" who'll cry annoyingly if he doesn't get his fucking way, and there's two jobs dad who gets home after the kids go to bed and is dead tired. My apologies to Jim Goad. (PS: Thanks, Zombieslayer, for letting me borrow that book. ISBN: 0684838648

I think people act like this: It is a sin for an underclassmen to act like someone of Privilege. Remember the expression: "putting on airs" ? We use it as a putdown, both if we're of privilege or if we aren't. If we're privileged, we're annoyed at those fakers, pretending to be one of us. If we aren't privileged, we're also annoyed at those fakers, pretending to be better than us.

[Zombieslayer suggested I break this up and I agreed, so this part is the next one.]

[Meanwhile, back to our show...]
that's all.
-r
PS:
No joke, that's it. I decided to write this at The Zombieslayer's request and that was before I realized that thing about driving not being a privilege either and decided I could write a couple sentences about how you can maim a person with a car weighing over a ton.

PPS: ZS: I hope this tides you over for awhile. I'll probably have alot to be pissed off about and alot of time to write about it when Mrs. Savage (ha!) starts school next week. Holy shit, the girl cat is licking my chest. IT FEELS WEIRD (sandpaper tongue). Guess I wasn't as clean as she expects. Talk to ya soon, drive safe.
-=-

2005-06-21T03:49:00.000-07:00

Small Annoyances.
I am not feeling well. I either have something, or I ate something or something. I remember when I never got sick and I had a "cast iron stomach" ... growing up and growing old suck.
First there was that whole "tariff on being alive" (Lydia Millet-Omnivores -- ISBN:1565120892) (I mean the whole work, jobs, bills, etc thing; so did Lydia, I think -- read the book)... then there were the small annoyances.

Pimples, I think, were the first of the "small" annoyances. Another was learning that only people who already like you will ever really take you seriously on face value. Everyone else, you have to convince. This isn't usually so bad, but lately, I've been wondering why this culture has gotten so lazy. I mean geez... just because someone says they have a degree does that mean they're qualified for a job? If you verify they have a degree or a certificate and they interview well, they must be qualified, right?
FUCK?!??

As a programmer, I can think of actual ways to test a person's qualifications. I don't think I would have to disqualify people who didn't have a degree. There are other ways to learn things, certainly CHEAPER ways to learn something than college/university. And if you prefer book-smart to street-smart, sure, take all the resumes out that don't have a degree from somewhere, it's your job to hire the right person, I guess.
And ya only have so much time, I'm sure. But if you hire people because they interview well and have a degree, you may lose your right to argue that you have incompetant or lazy employees. It's ohkay if you aren't rude and don't give them a bad reference. That future employer deserves what they get, right? Or you can't fire them because everyone likes to sue lately, they'll make something up, rather than just have their nuts handed to them on the way out and have to shape up? Sorry, I digress.

Another small annoyance is ear hair. What the fuck is this about, anyway? There is absolutely no reason for this. I yank them out just to punish my body for being so asinine. Nose hair too. Nose hair clipper? Not me, give me the tweezers... I've got some time to kill.

Moles that grow hair suddenly and make you think you have a tumor ... (I mean they do if someone warns you that a mole that suddenly grows hair or suddenly stops growing hair is potentially tumorous...) yeah, they're annoying.

Muscle/joint pain (maybe I'm not old enough for this shit yet, but I'm waiting with the Bengay, just in case).

Random cold-like symptoms. Like, why do I feel it in my ears sometimes when I swallow?

I still rarely get headaches and I remember the tylenol tamering scares from my youth. I'm pretty sure I'll never take anything from a bottle for a headache. Give me a witchdoctor and a few chants, I'll be fine. (ps. aspirin gives me nosebleeds)...

Knowledge. Yeah. It's a small annoyance. The more I learn, the less I like. I say that so often now that it is practically my mantra. I knew a girl, I liked her, we were friends, but then I met her husband and he was a nice guy. Totally opposite. After that, the more I learned about her (self-obsessed, cheats on him, etc.) the less I liked, the more I knew about him, the more I thought he was a stand up guy that I could spend a few hours talking to. His only fault: being tethered to her. She cheats on him and he apologizes and promises to be a better whatever... geez: people. But like movies, too. Normally I like all movies. But then I have to start learning things. GEEZISFUCK! If I didn't know James had spent so much money on Titanic and that it was really really and I do mean REALLY historically inaccurate, I may have liked it -- doubtful, as I'm a writer and the writing was ... well, you've seen it -- the biggest problem was those people who thought it was so historically accurate. WHATTHEFUCKANDAHALF?!?? Like my dad -- this shithead thought it was a GOOD thing that they had this replica made. *rolls eyes*

Sweat. Yeah, sweat. When I was a kid, I don't remember it being an issue. Maybe I had friends without noses or something, but I played outside and hung out with friends and I don't remember so much sweat. Did my damn body just one day in my mid-twenties decide to start cooling itself off with this obnoxious fluid? I swear it wasn't a problem when I was a kid. But maybe my friends didn't have noses, because I don't remember stuff like brushing my teeth and no one stopped being my friend or left me toothpaste in the mailbox or anything. Hm.

I should say, 'hair in general,' but I'm kind of proud of my hair, that is, the ability to grow hair. I don't understand why it has to grow, say, on my back or shoulders -- maybe it is so I can impress bears, I don't know. But the hair on my chest or face I wouldn't trade for the world. True, I'd prefer to be clean shaven (less maintenance -- another annoyance of growing up, all the maintenance. The more ya learn, the more ya have to do, ...) but the ABILITY to grow hair, so my girlfriend can say: "I like you with a beard" that's something. My best friend can't grow hair on his face worth shit. I can't offer him some of mine, it would be mean. It'd be sincere, but mean.

OH! I just thought of a MAJOR annoyance! Remember some of the stuff you did as a kid that was really fun and you didn't understand why adults had to be so uptight and try to make you stop doing it? I'm one of them now. I can still remember being a kid, so I'm not that bad, plus I don't own any property, that also helps, but still. Sometimes kids can be real assholes and incredibly self-centered. You ask yourself: Was I this self-absorbed when I was a kid? Maybe a better question would be, "would I know it if I was this self-absorbed" ...
Sometimes I give myself credit: I actually think something has happened to society. Kids seem to get away with alot more since I started seeing those "baby on board" signs in car windows. Hm.

I don't remember petty arguments either. I'm sure when I was a kid we had petty arguments, but kids can't compete with adults on this. I mean I swear I was sitting at [The Zombieslayer]'s dining table with someone who I'd normally agree with but she was making petty arguments all over the place, with me -- and bystanders would think we were on the same god damned side. What is this about? I also can't remember having a girlfriend who wasn't incredibly needy who didn't start petty arguments with me. Or I started them with her. Whatever: point is, whoa! Does it make us happy or something, as adults, to be right about every little thing?
(People who know me will say that it apparently does make me happy to be right about every little thing.)
(People who know me better will say that I can be persuaded.)
Some people have claimed that I'm a good listener. I wonder if they made this observation while I was asleep.

SLEEP! A MAJOR ANNOYANCE IN MY LIFE HAS BEEN SLEEP. But as an adult it is a ton worse. Now when my damn overactive brain keeps me awake (for example, typing this), I have to sleep all the next day. Or, if someone wakes me up, I'm really irritable. Very impatient.

Go ahead, wake me up. ;)

I'll probably think of a million more when I click "Publish Post" but in the meantime, feel free to disagree or add your own.
-r
PS:
An annoyance that has nothing to do with my own age: people who are just a little older than me expecting me to bow to their wisdom. Really irritating.
Thanks for reading!
-=-

shut-the-fuck-up (as a debate tactic)

2005-06-19T03:59:00.000-07:00

Two issues:
Debating dos and don'ts

The stages of grief

---

No one ever listens to me and it never ends, but I'll try anyway.
Perhaps I can get some input on this from ZS, that'd be good, I'm lazy as hell
Here's the mini-lecture:
----
O.K. I've resisted doing this, because it never ends and no one ever listens to me, but...
There is a correct way to debate and an incorrect way to debate.
You know you're debating incorrectly if you're a) not making any sense, b) talking about things that aren't at issue (beating a dead horse) c) talking about another issue completely (without some kind of clever tie-in) d) attacking the other speakers.
...
In fact, 'd' isn't even officially on the list, because almost everyone knows that is completely wrong. It is a phallacy. *wink wink* There is a nice Latin expression it is argument ad hominum -- attacking the person, not the argument.
e) raising the volume and repetition aren't good techniques, either.
There's more, I'm lazy.
----

I know the first stage of grief is denial, and I know another is anger and another is bargaining: What are they all and what order are they in, anyone?

-r

As long as we're talking about things that have stages and an order, what are the 12 steps in a twelve-step program (a la AA)...?
(I know the first one [?] is admitting you have a problem, one is something about a higher power ... there's one about making amends -- I think ... help out?)
-=-

Let's all visit the local 24 hour porno store

2005-06-18T07:00:00.000-07:00

I figured I'd post another transcript of my Monday night "Mic-less Open Mic" ...
(enjoy)
-----

Porn store.

Several years ago, I worked in a porn store. If I tell that to people who know me, their most often reaction is surprise. As [The Zombieslayer] would say, I'm a computer guy. In L.A. and Orange Counties, I was “The Computer Guy,” for several years. No one knew my name was Rob, or at least that's how it seemed, far less did they know I'm a writer, a poet, etc. I was a geek, I was The computer guy.

Eons ago, when I was an undergraduate at Whittier College – the same school Nixon went to, woohoo – I was making so much money as a computer consultant that I was financially secure enough to blow that pop stand and rent an apartment a couple blocks away. My problems with “higher learning,” private colleges, and Whittier College itself could, perhaps be subjects themselves of one of these rants – they probably will be. But the point is that I left, not just because I was annoyed, or because I had philosophical differences or because I felt lied to and insulted, but because I had a whole other gig which, at least, paid for itself. This was near the end of my second year at Whittier, I wasn't destined to finish that forth semester.

The problem with being independently successful, and, especially when a person is young, is that you are subject to the Gambler’s Fallacy – that being that you attribute your success to something positive in your character, and failures are blamed on other people, or even chance. The problem with this is that, just like a gambler at a roulette wheel, even if you have a winning streak, it is still just chance. [the Zombieslayer], over there, would disagree with me, I know, we talked about it.

But however and whoever you credit or blame for your successes or failures, no philosophy will help if you don’t understand that independent success is fucking fragile. Or, perhaps I should say, if the troll guarding the bridge is nice enough to let you through, you shouldn’t question, taunt or challenge him.

I’m not sure if I’m still a romantic. True, I still think of myself as a writer, a poet – by the way, Whittier College calls it’s athletes ‘Poets’ – people who have met me and known me for a few minutes, will tell you that I’m sensitive (perhaps even whiny), but the point is that I used to be a serious romantic. The girl I went to prom with went to UC, Irvine and I visited her, via motorcycle, on weekends. She had this disturbing idea that the two of us should get married. Romantic as I may have been, I still had this ideology that it wouldn’t work out if we just dive right in, without, at least, testing the water. So I suggested a somewhat, I thought, simple compromise: Move in together. Eventually, she bowed to my logic and agreed.

In order to accomplish this, both of us had to make some sacrifices. Considering her life continued on uninterrupted and she has been more or less unscathed by the experience, in fact, she used to tell me that I did certain emotional, and spiritual things for her, I have been subsequently forced to acknowledge that my sacrifice was the greater, because I alienated my customers and almost immediately became unemployed.

Unfortunately, I’d already tasted the sweet twin successes of doing what I like and being emotionally, mentally and financially rewarded at the same time. I was, and am, idealistic as hell.

What happened, it seems, is that because I couldn’t get to where my customers were, they were forced to call other computer people and forget about me. I have a driver’s license, but I hate to drive; that, too, is another subject for another rant, but I’m more-or-less a pedestrian. Before “compromising” with that girl, I’d either bus to where I worked, my customers would pick me up or my friend and roommate would drive me. The girl promised to drive me to customers – I made so much money doing it that it made financial sense to her, or so I was led to believe. Unfortunately, she didn’t exactly keep her end of the bargain, the drives from Anaheim to industrial L.A. annoyed and wearied her. We made one and only one trip. I was quickly and unceremoniously replaced because I couldn’t be “dependable.” Which is saying something, considering that I have since then learned that I was unbelievably inexpensive at that time.

This, seems to have led to a depression and conflict-of-philosophy and reality that has been right over my left shoulder ever since.

Fast-forward... much later, my life went from bad to worse to shitty. Things happened and it’d take several more rants to encompass them all. And this one is already way too fucking long and personal. And here is where, finally, we get to the porn store.

I was living in a motel north of town, and sometimes I’d walk to meet my friend – same one – at the bus after dark. I’m surprised I was never mugged, being so obviously white and out-of-place, anyway, several times I passed a porn store, “Le Sex Shoppe,” on my way to and from the bus stop. There was a sign in the window, ‘Help Wanted.’

I think, at the time, I sensed that applying was the only qualification for the job, but maybe my nerves or pride kept me from going in. In time, the sign came down and I remember thinking how I had missed a chance, considering the situation was nearing a state of emergency. I was really sad, I remember.

So when the sign went back up, I applied immediately. And got the job, of course, or I wouldn’t be standing here avoiding the topic for 7 and a half minutes!

People find out I worked for a porn store and they are surprised. My grandmother, whom I would expect, would be offended, was paradoxically happy, because it was a job. But I’m really frustrated with that viewpoint. What I learned at that store still pisses me off. A few people in Denver make a ton of money, and I mean A TON and EVERYONE ELSE is exploited. I’m not talking about the movie makers and the “models,” I’m talking about employees. It was a Walmart/Indian casino atmosphere – abuse the poor and take serious advantage of other people’s weaknesses and sins for pure profit. They were very creepy about the money, considering the truckloads they make. Examples? Six hour shifts so they don’t have to give benefits, just like Walmart. The store was 24/365 – twenty-four hours a day, three hundred sixty-five days a year – they staggered the shifts! It was rare that a person had the same schedule day-to-day, let alone, week-to-week. This means that it can seriously fuck up your sleep/wake cycles and I think it is done on purpose so you won’t go and get too ambitious. Don’t bother complaining, the sign can go back up in the window...

All the time, I get a reaction that if I am a guy and I worked at a porn store, didn’t I enjoy it? No, I did not. I could neither detach myself, nor enjoy it. On one hand I have a penis and it has no morals. On the other hand, it was a really disgusting way to spend one’s time. I learned by doing it that I didn’t want to be a cog in that machine, and, by extension, I didn’t want to be a cog in ANY machine. I know what happens: They use you, they pay you as little as they can and abandon you if you hint that you want to stop being a drone.

I should mention a few things I observed working there because the anthropologist behind my eyes sometimes takes good notes:

Nothing about the customers gave them away. There was no binding, generalizing feature. The only thing they had in common, as far as I could tell, was they frequently or infrequently indulged their sad little lives with porn.
Men more often frequent porn stores. If they come with a female – if they are a couple, they look around and shyly purchase some magazines or videos and more often than not, a dildo – if she is a lesbian and he is her lez-hag (male of fag-hag? Anyone?) they are all business and, kind of creepy. Not so, the gay men with their fag-hags. They seem to be enjoying themselves as if the porn store were a free amusement park. We – employees – don’t care, because almost everyone who comes in buys something. Eventually he will get a gay porn video and she’ll get fluffy handcuffs or some other novelty, tasty lube, colored condoms, whatever.
When women come, they almost always come as a group and I, personally, hate those groups, they never buy anything and I think they make serious customers nervous. When they do buy something, it is usually the cheapest thing and then it’s like they’re making a big joke out of actually talking to the cashier, myself or whoever. I wonder if they act this way at the fucking Gap.
Drunk people. (Needs no explanation.)
People you know from elsewhere. It is really weird and disconcerting to sell suspicious items to someone you knew in a former life. There was a guy that was my work-study boss while I was in college. He frequently rented gay porn. I never knew. I was probably better off not knowing. But I don’t care either, so maybe not. I once told another porn customer – briefly a friend, though this guy had some kind of disturbing man-crush on me – I never trust people who have a crush on me – anyway I told this guy about how I’d worked for someone who later rented gay porn and he acted like I should be shocked or disturbed. Yeah, but my boss never suggested that it’d be fun to put my dick in his mouth.
The security people are gorillas. They are ignorant assholes. In fact, I’m sorry, I seem to have said something that has no choice but to offend gorillas.
Other co-workers were much better adjusted than I was to the fact that they were being taken advantage of. But, paradoxically, the other employees I met I really respected and liked. It’s depressing.
Even though, or perhaps because of, the management and ownership being weird about security and the money, it was easy to steal from them. Employees or customers, by my observation, could have easily noticed and taken advantage of several leaks in the money chain-of-custody or holes in the security (guards and cameras). I, in fact, took advantage of several opportunities to permanently borrow porn tokens (like arcade tokens – and sometimes, actual arcade tokens) with zodiac signs on them.

O.k. That’s all for now. At exactly three pages, this is just too long. Too much back-story.

-----
-r
PS:
Always a PS.
-=-

RIP, stupit

2005-06-16T00:00:00.000-07:00

I had to delete a whole whatever because people were getting a bit evil.

I have to mention that asking someone if they're a "fag" is offensive as hell. If you want to be homophobic or ignorant or scared of differences that is your own thing. But I've known too many people and I cannot sit idly as this filth is paraded about.

I want people to stop the killing; Here is my lecture:

----
This may be because the true, worth while stories are not "fun" to Fox news or its (very selective) audience.

I haven't been reading about these subjects very long (like Fox, I typically avoid the news). I'm just so shocked and horrified.

We're killing people and ruining our planet and country's financial future while the government officials and 'talking heads' who (supposedly patrioticly) support them (to speak against them is treason, remember?) ... are doing these weird immature "hey, look over there!" (and point over our shoulders dramatically) manuvers ... to distract us (?) or delay the inevitable (?) ...

We need to get our priorities straight. I used to care about, for instance, feeding the starving and housing the homeless; now I just wish we'd stop killing people. Forget about stopping OTHER people (in Africa, for instance) from killing each-other...

1) stop murdering people
2) stop making healthcare / jobs unavailable
3) stop doing anything else that violates the golden rule (do unto others...?)
4) o.k. now that we aren't in the hole for doing evil things to random others, now we can start to try to help out, ...
4a) if there are natural disasters, send aid.
4a(i) some people may be more interested in saving people closer to them. Unless we stop the killing, this seems like a trivial argument, however, it seems like we'd give loyalty to people in our family, friends and neighborhood (county, state, country) first then others (continent, hemisphere, planet, solar system, galaxy ... etc.) but, as I said, I no longer care who we 'help' since we are doing evil things all over the planet and /to/ the planet.
4b) stop being judgemental about people's shitty situations, this is blaming the victim. I am aware that a person can make a case that they are a victim no matter what they've done to their lives, but I'm really not going to draw a line. Some people need to be removed from power positions and as a culture it is our duty to keep certain people from doing too much harm; how we help them after they aren't harming us, is another thing.
4c) feed the hungry, house the homeless, etc.
...
but we aren't that altruistic so I wish we'd stop talking as though we (collectively) are. I mean, I know there are nice people out there, so I don't mean to offend, but at the moment we kind of deserve any negative reputation we (collectively) have. There are two other things:
i- somehow the electorate needs to be informed about issues and potential government officials' histories.
ii- somehow culturally we need to ensure that everyone who can vote (ie. is a citizen or permanent resident -- certain things, like if you own a home, where your home-owner's-tax-money is going) ... actually does vote. The ignorance and apathy has, as far as I can back-trace it, caused the current crisis. And I don't mind using that word: crisis.
We seem to be heading for either a) some kind of facism / nazi germany thing or b) a 21st century version of the great depression.
what else is there? Will DSM help us in time?
...
(...and...)
sorry, everything seems to be formatted as lists. also sorry there are holes in the lists.
----

I want people to stop abusing power; Here is my lecture:

----
So someone runs their SUV over my dog, right outside my front door -- the SUV has a really new looking SPCA sticker. The person verifies they hit a dog, gets back into their SUV and drives off.

Meanwhile...

The sheriff is driving around town, letting people's dogs out of their yards or even he's breaking windows to leave the front door open so the dogs, and, later, cats too, can escape -- and be hit by cars, usually his own.

Ya see -- he has a deal with the local pet store where he gets kickbacks -- a percentage of sales -- when dogs and cats are sold. Before this madness, but the day after he signed the deal with Ted the PetShop guy, the sheriff's wife and her brother opened a company which bought the local pet cemetary.

Everyone knows this. Yet no one can stop it. Who are ya gonna call? The police?!?? -- I repeat: it's the SHERIFF doing it!
And the SPCA-sticker-SUV-person? I guess it is just remotely possible he doesn't know about the sheriff's and the sheriff's family's ... businesses ...

But is it?

I'm mad as hell because this is the situation in Iraq. The over One-thousand-seven-hundred Americans dead and the tens-of-thousands of Iraqis ... No Weapons of Mass Destruction, no ties with Osama Bin Laden
Nothing! "Aren't we just so glad Saddam is outta there?"
What the fuck?
Aren't we glad Haliburton (which means Dick Cheney) can PROFIT off our dead sons and daughters?
Why are they -- administration/media -- covering this stuff up?
Enabling by ignoring.
Fucking Wake Up People!
--------------------------------------
Clinton is a "disgrace" for lying about a blowjob?!??
What about Iraq? What about using 9/11 terrorists to justify taking away our rights then expecting us to believe that soldiers are right _now_ dying in Iraq /DEFENDING/ these rights -- Ah!

What right? The right for rich people to do what they want no matter what happens to others?
I'm gonna go back to my crying now, thanks.
----

If you don't agree, if you think I'm wrong, tell me and explain. I'll try to catch up and understand your point of view.

If you want to resort to name calling, I'll just start deleting your posts.
-r
PS:
Lastly, if you are commenting on one lecture but not both, please specify. The second one was presented verbally here in town to an almost nonexistant audience (The Zombieslayer was sick -- and would refuse to debate the subject anyway).
Thanks in advance for keeping it civil.
-=-

Crazies

Time Travelin'

GAS PRICE WAR!!!!

Absentee

Productive

Headings

H3

Pictures

Clone wars

CSU

Chicago

Chicago

Fighting

Calculus(t)

Minidisc

Too much coffee

My D&D alter-ego

Which D&D Character is Mrs. Savage?

I've been away

ReadMyList: New Blog

Aussie News

Fuckin' Liberal-conservatives

classic email volley

To: ZombieslayerFrom: savage

Subject: Re: some help here?

We hope you enjoy your exploration of Martinique.

The election scheduled for May 11 would not take place.

MT. PELÉE ERUPTION (1902)

The Election of May 11th, 1902

THE ERUPTION OF MAY 8, 1902

John Allen Paulos wants you to understand probability

Math Illiteracy

Innumeracy, pt. 1

Hey Rob, Believe in Good People, please?

Blame Canada!

Rodent wanted: Small and Blind

Subject: why i will not help you dupe my friends

big crayons | small walls

Mic-less Open Mic

Senseless and/or outdated laws

How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie-roll center of a tootsie-pop?

I'm responding to Zombieslayer's article about third parties.

Later, I will eat your dog.

Old People

Cages of grief

Elsabeth Kubler-Ross5 Stages of Grief

Send in the Wolfe

Gene Wolfe

Driving is a cancer

shut-the-fuck-up (as a debate tactic)

Let's all visit the local 24 hour porno store

RIP, stupit

To: Zombieslayer
From: savage

Elsabeth Kubler-Ross
5 Stages of Grief